Free to Love

Chapter 54

Shawn

Christmas was wonderful. There was nothing I enjoyed more than having my house full of the people I loved. It wasn't that long ago that the holiday was extremely difficult for me, but having my girl with me this season made a huge difference. I'd had a hard time on the anniversary of Mallory's death, but it got a little easier each year.

The house in the woods looked beautiful, thanks mainly to Joanna. She'd insisted I needed more Christmas lights inside and outside the house. I thought she was going overboard, but the end result was spectacular. Gracie and Nolan were enchanted by how festive our home was. Their favorite thing to do was to get ready for bed and then come downstairs in their jammies to sit in the living room with only the numerous strings of lights and the tree illuminating the room. I usually had to carry them up to their rooms since they'd fall asleep watching the twinkling lights.

We ate nonstop. Joanna and I prepared Christmas Eve dinner. Parker and Jean made breakfast on Christmas morning. Aaliyah and Alec made appetizers as a late lunch that day, and my parents cooked Christmas dinner. Between these meals, we were eating the dozens of cookies my parents had made with the kids. Thank god the house had a gym. Joanna and I got up early every day to work out.

The kids loved having Jo with us for the holiday. The more time we spent together doing family-ish things, the more strongly I felt that I wanted Jo to become an actual member of the Mendes family. We hadn't even been together for six months, though. I worried about rushing things, but if there was one thing I'd learned from my time with Mal, it was that time was precious and you should never waste a single moment of it.

Joanna and I exchanged gifts. It had been my thing with Mal to do gestures or handmade things, but I couldn't really impose that same tradition on my girlfriend. I was pretty conscious of not doing things identical to how I'd done them before.

Her gift to me was a beautiful leather jacket. I never clothes shopped anymore, and the jacket I usually wore was at least seven years old. When I'd been in the spotlight, I felt pressure to dress well and look good. I still liked to look good. I was less than a year from 30 and I worked out every day and kept myself well groomed. I'd relaxed as far as my style went, though. I dressed for comfort.

My gift to Joanna was a weekend getaway to the winter carnival in Quebec City in early February, which happened to be close to her birthday. Maybe that was kind of a gesture rather than a gift, but I'd put the plane tickets in a box with a set of cashmere gloves and a hat so it definitely was gift-like.

                              ~~~~~~

Brian and Darcy had gotten engaged over Christmas. I decided to throw them a party in January. It was nothing like the parties I used to host. Most of my friends were married and many had children. We'd settled down a lot as we'd gotten older.

I convinced Kris and Mark to come and to bring the baby. Joanna arranged for her youngest sister to babysit that night. We set up a sort of daycare in the master bedroom. My own kids weren't there, though. They were spending the night with my folks. I knew they would try to join the party instead of staying in the designated babysitting area. Plus, I wanted Joanna to stay over after the party.

Vera and her boyfriend, Devon, also came. He was a great guy, and definitely more suited for her than Charlie had been. She'd had a brief fling with Puth after I'd introduced them, but the long distance thing didn't work.

The party started fairly early, which was part of that settling down thing, but it went late. No one got smashed, but the drinks were flowing and people were definitely enjoying themselves. Despite Joanna's protests, I'd hired a caterer to do the food. I wanted her to just relax and not spend hours leading up to the party in the kitchen. Part of this was selfishness. I didn't want her exhausted by the time we went to bed. We hadn't spent a whole night together in the same bed since November.

When Brian and Darcy arrived, everyone cheered and offered their congratulations. They announced that they'd be getting married in the fall.

I caught Joanna admiring Darcy's beautiful ring after hugging her.

"It's so pretty, Darcy! Did you give Brian hints about what you liked?" she asked.

"No, but he asked my mom. She told him I wouldn't want a diamond, so that's why he got the emerald instead."

"I love that it's a different gemstone. It makes it so much more unique. Plus, the whole diamond industry is a scam. The idea that diamonds were the only option for engagement rings didn't start until diamond company pushed it before World War II."

I filed her views on this away in my mind.

Later in the evening, Brooke and Evans arrived. Joanna and I decided to invite them since we had so many mutual friends, including the newly engaged couple. I'd been amused when Jo told me they were dating, although it didn't really surprise me that much.

"How are you doing, Mendes?" Evans asked, clapping a hand on my back.

"Great, thanks. I'm glad you could make it."

Brooke smiled and said, "I'm happy we can all move past any ancient history between us and be friends."

"Absolutely," I agreed.

I did keep an eye on Evans to see if he looked at Joanna a bit too much. I didn't care at all that he and Brooke were together, but I didn't fully trust him after that crazy last-ditch proposal. He hardly spoke with Jo the entire evening and was very loving towards Brooke. It made me happy to think that they'd found each other after our failed relationships. They made a good pair.

The party wound down around 2:00 AM. I persuaded Joanna to save the clean-up for the next day. None of our out of town guests were staying with us, so we had the place to ourselves. When the kids arrived home the next morning, we'd only gotten a couple hours of sleep. It was worth it, though.

                              ~~~~~~

I called a meeting with Andrew and Island in late January. I'd written quite a few new songs and wanted to talk to them about it.

Joanna stayed at my condo to watch the kids while I spent two days in New York. The fact that they could just ride to and home from school with her made it very convenient.

Ziggy smiled across the conference room table from me. "Technically, you're no longer under contract with us."

I nodded. "I know. Island has always been my home, though. If I'm going to release any new music, I want it to be with you."

"We'd obviously love to make that happen," he said. He had a smirk on his face.

"Go ahead and say it," I said.

Ziggy gave me an innocent look. "Say what?"

I looked from him to Andrew. "I know you both want to tell me 'I told you so.' It's written all over your face, Zig. Just say it so we can move on."

"I'm not going to say it. It's taken you way longer to get back to music than I thought it would. You obviously needed that time off to be a father and to heal. You were right."

"So why the grin?"

"I'm just so fucking happy you're back in the game. I can't wait to hear your new stuff and I'm even more excited to see how you move forward as a musician. Your albums are still selling, so I know you have a solid fan base. Making a comeback album is going to be huge and I'm excited."

Andrew added, "Is touring going to be an option? Releasing albums is great, but touring is essential."

"I can tour over summers, but that's probably it. It's the only time I could bring Joanna and the kids with me, and I can't tour without them."

Andrew and Ziggy exchanged a look. "Things are that serious?" Ziggy asked.

"Yeah. Just between us, I want to marry Joanna. I'm not sure when, though. My guess is that it'll happen long before the album gets released. That's one reason I'm coming to you now. When I quit music, I believed I'd be a single dad the rest of my life. Joanna's changed everything. She's inspired me to write again and, if she'll have me, we'll be a family. It opens up some possibilities for me."

Ziggy picked up his phone and dialed a number.

"Meredith? Send Joanna Finlay four dozen roses with a thank you note. I'll text you her info."

I laughed. "Just send them to my place. That's where she is."