MIXED EMOTIONS

35. A NIGHT TO REMEMBER

I gasped when Kristian opened the door to the hotel room. It was beautiful. There was one big king sized bed, roses everywhere. There was champagne on ice. The light are dimmed. It was very romantic. Too romantic.

"Kristian! This is nice. Why'd you do this?" I asked him with a smile.

"I did it for you," He answered.

"Why?" He went out of his way to set up all this, it makes me curious.

"'Cause I love you and I don't want to lose you again." He kissed my forehead, then my nose and finally my lips. He traced my lips with his tongue asking for entrance and I let his tongue enter my mouth. Our tongues performed a dance. An erotic dance. He planted soft kisses on my neck, my shoulders and along my collarbones.

A moan escaped my lips. He kept kissing me. I wanted him to kiss till I couldn't get enough. His body felt so good pressed against mine. He lifted me and carried me to the bed without breaking the kiss.

He placed me gently on the bed and took off my heels. His hands started roaming my body. They traveled up my thighs and that's when it clicks.

Is this happening right now? With Kristian? This is so unreal, but it felt so good. And I didn't want him to stop.

He unzipped my dress and smiled at my black laced bra and matching thong. He kissed my neck and traveled down my breasts. He explored them and I couldn't help the moans that escaped my mouth.

I froze and tensed up when his hand went to my panties.

"I won't make you do anything you don't want to do. Just say the word and I'll stop." He looked into my eyes.

Am I ready to give up my virginity to Kristian? I don't want to regret doing it with him, but I don't want to regret not doing it with him. I've always wanted to know where Jayden and I's relationship would go. If we would take the next step in our relationship. Jayden and I have almost gotten to the point where we almost had sex but it never really happened.

I was too scared. I wasn't ready. I chickened out every time we got close. I knew he wasn't a virgin and he never forced me. Although he didn't show it, I could tell he got aggravated with me every time I stopped him from going to far.

I felt more connected to Kristian right now then I ever felt before. I wanted to do this. I was ready. This felt right. It felt right being with Kristian.

"I don't want to stop." I told him.

"Are you sure, baby?" He ran his thumb down my cheek.

"Yes," I nodded. "You have a condom? I won't do it without a condom."

"Yeah," He reached over me and pulled out a handful of condoms and placed them on the night stand beside the bed.

"You think we're gonna use all of it?" I smirked.

"Yes. We can do it all night, baby." He leaned down and kissed my lips. He left trails of kisses down my stomach. He pulled my panties down with his teeth and I raised an eyebrow. What has he been up to lately?

My moans filled the room as he explored my body. His tongue could do things I never thought possible.

Kristian was so gentle with me. He didn't go too hard or fast. He took his time with me. He didn't rush anything. Excluding the pain, it was good. It felt right being with Kristian. I trusted him with my body.

Now I know why Camille and Chris were grinning they way they were back at the party. They knew Kristian had set this up. I'm glad he did.

I laid on Kristian's chest, still stunned at the fact that I just lost my virginity. To my best friend. It seemed like a dream. A sweet dream that I didn't want to wake up from.

It also felt weird afterwards. I never expected this to happen. On graduation day. We've been through so much together. I remember always crying on Kristian's shoulder no matter how much I hated it. His house was my second home. He always found a way to make me laugh or smile. And I did the same for him.

Losing Kristian was harder then losing both Lexi and Jayden. I always had a closer and tighter bond with Kristian. Some things I told him, I never would have told Lexi or Camille. I grew to love his family as if they were my own. I sought love from them when I couldn't get any at home. They were always there. Hopefully some day, I'll have a family just as comforting and loving as theirs.

Thinking about all of this caused a tear to run down my cheek. And another. I let out a small whimper and sobbed quietly.

"Chanel," Kristian said. "Are you okay?"

"Yes." I whispered.

"Then why are you crying? Did I hurt you, baby?"

I shook my head. "You didn't hurt me."

"Then what's the matter? What's wrong?"

"Nothing." I said trying to sound convincing. I wish these tears would stop coming down so hard. I hate crying in front of people. He bought my face to his. He wiped my tears away. He kissed my eyelids and then my cheek.

That simple gesture made me smile and want to cry more.

"Now tell daddy what's wrong." He demanded. I playfully hit him in the chest.

"You're not my daddy."

He grinned. "Oh really? The way I was making you moan-"

I hit him upside his head. "Shut up!" We both laughed and when I told him I was fine, he didn't press the issue.

We stayed up all night talking, watching movies, eating and laughing all night. Kristian fell asleep with me placing soft kisses all over his face.

I'm desperately going to miss him when we leave for school. I'll be going to New York and he'll be going to Alabama for football. Not seeing him and touching and feeling him is going to drive me crazy. I honestly don't know where or how our relationship is going to be like. I hope nothing changes. I like us the way were are perfectly fine.

I can come to him with anything and he can come to me with anything. We were extremely comfortable with each other. It was never awkward. We shared a special bond that I could never have with anyone else.

I think I'm in love with him. This time I have a good feeling about this. Us. What I went threw was meant to break me into tiny pieces, and it did. But I ended up becoming even stronger than before at the end.

If I could go back, I wouldn't change a thing. I am loving the outcome of the horrible situations I went threw.

I pressed my body into Kristian's. He squirmed and responded to me by wrapping his arms tighter around me.

"There's something I forgot to tell you," I whispered in his ear.

"What is it?" He asked.

"I forgot to say congratulations. We made it, Kris."

❤ ❤ ❤

Thanks for reading!!!! Sorry, had to get a little corny! This chapter was so cliche!

One more chapter and the book will be ending :( This is sooo saddening!

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