My Love

Chapter 14: Sweet Dreams

Our van pulls up to the hotel. We get out and walk into the lobby.

"Hey guys. We should watch a movie!" Normani suggests.

"Yeah! That sounds fun." Ally said.

"Guys, I'm tired. I don't feel like watching a movie." I said. Which wasn't a complete lie. I was tire. But I wasn't in the mood to watch a movie. All I wanted to do was go on Tumblr.

"Yeah. Same. Sorry. I'm pretty tired too." Camila said. Normani and Ally looked disappointed.

"I'll watch a movie with you guys." Dinah said excitedly.

"Well if Dinah's going to be there, then I will." Camila said.

"No. You need you're sleep. You've been staying up too late. You could barely keep your eyes open today." Dinah joked.

"Okay. Fine. I'll go to bed." Camila pouted.

"Good girl. Good night chancho." Dinah said overly emotional.

"Good night Cheechee." Camila said just as dramatically. These two are so weird.

The girls went to Normani's room to watch the movie. I decided to visit Camila. This is a perfect time to talk to her. I walked to her room and knocked on her door. In a matter of seconds Camila opened the door.

"Hey, Camila. I was wondering if maybe we could talk." I suggested.

"That's all we ever do nowadays. Have 'talks'." She said annoyed.

"I just want to have a normal conversation with you. Even when we were together, we didn't really talk. I miss us talking." I said honestly.

"We never were together, but fine."
She said, letting me. She climbed on the bed and I sat next to her.

"So how's life?" I asked her.

"Why do you do this to me, Lauren?" She asked me.

"Shit, what did I do now?" I asked, frustrated at myself.

"Nothing. And that's the problem. Every day I fall more and more in love with you and you're not doing anything. I... Never mind." She said.

"No, Camila. I want you to tell me how you feel. Let out your anger. Hit me if you need to. I promised I'd always be here for you so here I am. Use me as an outlet. Make me useful." I told her.

"Okay. You want me to be honest?" She questioned.

"Yes. Don't worry about hurting my feelings. Just do what you need to do." I responded.

"You're the most gigantic, hypocritical, pussy I've ever met. But I love you so much. And I hate myself for it. I love you! Doesn't that mean anything to you. Why are you so embarrassed? Am I not good enough for you? And I not pretty enough? Am I too dorky? God, you can be such an asshole sometimes. Stop worrying about what people think! Lauren Jauregui, you're a coward. You like to put on that you're this badass that doesn't care about what people think but inside you're just a cowardly little girl who puts her reputation as her top priority." She finished.

"You honestly think that? You think that I put myself before other people? I sacrifice so much for everybody and you have the nerve to say that?" I said, unimaginably hurt.

"Lauren, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. You're one of the most selfless people ever but you're reputation and image influence you more than it should. It hurts people. It hurts me. You're basically saying how people view you is more important than our love." She said, tears starting to form in her eyes. I took her into my arms.

"It's not that, Camz. I promise. It's more than just how people view me. It's also my family and how I'll see myself. I'm not ready, Camila. I guess you're right. I am a coward." I say sadly.

"I love you Lauren. So much." She says.

"I love you, too." I respond.

"Stay with me, tonight. Let's just forget about reality and make our own little fantasy just for one night. I can't take another night of sleeping with a broken heart. I want you and your emerald eyes to fill my dreams and I want to wake up feeling wanted. I want to wake up in your arms. Stay with me. Please." She tells me.

I shift over and cut the lamp off.

"Come here." I command.

She crawls towards me. I lift the sheets up and we get in. My arms find their way around her slender frame. My face inhales the vanilla scent from her body I've come to love. I place sweet kisses up her neck.

"You're my favorite fantasy." I whisper in her ear.

"I love you, Lauren." She says with a smile in her voice.

"I love you more, angel." I respond.

We quickly fall asleep, getting the best sleep that either of us have gotten in months.