Lucky: Shawn Mendes Fanfic

Australia

Shawn's POV
Australia.

Sydney, Australia to be exact.

Shawn Mendes: Revisited was released today.
I will be performing Mercy for the first time tonight. I guess I'm just terrified of what it will do to me when I sing it, considering when I wrote it.

Flashback
"Come here," I tell her, waving her over. She looks up at me like she doesn't believe me. I wave her over again. She shuffles in the door the rest of the way and closes it after her. She walks over to my bed and I open the covers for her. She climbs in and snuggles up next to me. Her arms wrap around me and she lays her head on my chest. I wrap one of my arms around her and pull her close. I lean over and kiss her on the forehead.

"Happy birthday, Aaliyah," I tell her. She's silent but I can feel her smile.

It's silent for a while, and I think she fell asleep. But then I hear a soft whisper come from her.

"She'll come around eventually."

••••••••••

I wake up the next morning to find Aaliyah still snuggled up next to me. I can't help but smile at her adorableness. Too bad I know I have to leave. I don't want to wake her up, but I also don't want to just leave without saying goodbye. I miss my family so much when I'm gone. I sigh lightly. I gently climb out of my bed, making sure Aaliyah's still wrapped in the blankets, and make my way to the bathroom to change. It doesn't take me long and I walk back to the bed. She's still out cold. I write her a short little note and set it on the side table, then I lean down and give her a kiss on the forehead. She shuffles around a little, but settles back down with a small smile on her face.

"I love you, Aaliyah," I whisper as I turn around. I quietly open and close the bedroom door. Sure enough, Mike and Jason are waiting for me. I go downstairs to say goodbye to my parents and then I'm off again.

••••••••••

As soon as we get onto the plane, I immediately go to the small separate room just for me. I lay down on the bed and finally let myself feel what just happened.

Samantha said no.

She left.

She doesn't feel the same way.

It's the first time that I've genuinely cried in months, maybe even a year. I close my eyes to try and help block out some of this pain.

She has no idea how much control she has over me. Everyone always mentions how I'm so tall, but I feel like I'm so small, so insignificant, when I'm with her. Her beauty, her brains, her personality, her laughter. And her smile. I know she doesn't mean anything. I know she isn't trying to hurt me. I know it, but my heart still feels like it's been ripped out of my chest and just handed to her. Oh my god. What is she doing to me? The worst part is, if she called me right now and asked me to come to her, I would make someone land this plane right now, and drive all night just to be with her. I take a deep breath and open my eyes. And through the tears, I look up and see my guitar, just sitting there.

End of Flashback

I really don't want to feel like how I felt that day ever again, but Samantha and I are friends. Best friends again and I don't want to ruin that for either one of us. Even though every time I see her, I want to kiss her gorgeous face and love her as much as she deserves to be loved.
God. Stop it, Shawn. Don't ruin what you are to each other, not again.

She means everything to me and if her happiness means us not being together, then I'll do anything to keep the best woman alive as happy as can be, even if it kills me inside to not be with her.