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t w e n t y - t w o

"Dr. Kirsche will be with you shortly."

Today was Evan's fifth session with the therapist. He was still nervous and Jonathan was still with him. He didn't know why he was so nervous since he'd already dealt with four sessions, but every time they walked into the building, Evan's stomach would start doing flips. It made him feel queasy.

"Evan?"

The Asian looked up and saw the redheaded professional smiling at him from the doorway that led to the back. Jonathan squeezed his hand like he always did and Evan got up, walking towards Dr. Kirsche.

"Hi Evan. How are you?"

"I'm... okay."

"That's good. Follow me to the back."

The beginning of every session was always the same. She called his name, he walked up to her, she said hi and asked how he was doing, he answered, and they went to the back. That part was easy; the questions, on the other hand, not so much.

Dr. Kirsche never really asked Evan anything too invasive or uncomforting, but he always feared that she would. He had an irrational fear of being judged by her, which of course he knew was irrational. She was a therapist, she was supposed to judge him.

"Before I start, Evan, I just want to inform you that today's questions might be triggering for you. Same rule applies like always: if you don't want to answer, you don't have to. I figured you deserved to know so you can prepare yourself."

Evan could feel his heart start to pound harder and his hands get sweaty, yet all he could do was swallow and nod.

"We're on Domain Five today and I've already explained to you what domain means. Today's domain is on relationships and sexuality. Are you ready?"

Another nod.

"Okay. You aren't the first person I've asked these questions to and I can guarantee that you aren't the last. Nobody here assumes anything about anyone and I promise I've had patients of all kinds of sexualities. Reflecting on our previous conversations, I do happen to know the answers to most of these questions. Am I correct in saying that you are in a relationship?"

"Y-es," Evan squeaked, voice cracking.

"What's your relationship like?"

How could Evan put it into words? Jonathan was his first relationship and it was going beautifully, if he did say so himself. He knew he was lucky; most people had first-relationship horror stories. Yet here was Evan, a Canadian Asian with an American boyfriend who truly loved and cared and provided for him. Was it too good to be true? Evan often stayed up late at night wondering that.

"It's hard to put into words," Evan answered honestly (and maybe even confidentally). "I've never been in a relationship before this one so maybe I'm being a little unrealistic, but it's like nothing I could have ever imagined. It's everything I could hope for and more."

His response made Dr. Kirsche smile wider. She loved listening to her patients talk about love because there were so many different opinions on the topic that she was always surprised.

"In terms of sexuality, how would you personally identify yourself, Evan?"

This was something Evan had never thought about. He had never really labeled himself as anything before. The only time labels were used on him was when he was bullied in high school and when Jonathan called him a nerd. Even when he started dating Jonathan, he hadn't stopped to think about what that made him. Most people came out their parents before bringing their partner home but Evan didn't. He never sat down with his mom and said, "I'm gay," or anything along those lines. One day he just told his mom that he was dating his roommate and that was it. She was happy. She didn't ask questions. She just accepted it. If heterosexuals didn't have to tell their parents that they were straight, then why did homosexuals have to tell their parents that they were gay?