Dying hope

Chapter 14: Is it worth it?

"Hey Beca how do you get all the popular girls to like you?" Benji asked flabbergasted as he saw Stacie eating a strawberry very seductively might he also add, while staring right at Beca during lunchtime. Beca currently at the moment was just as shocked as he was, I mean this girl absolutely has no fear. "I am just as surprised as you are dude." Beca said looking away from Stacie as soon as she bit down harshly on the strawberry to look at Benji. Jesse chuckled while reading his magazine, "I'm sure Beca is just being modest my dear boy, I bet she beats off all the girls at the other schools she went too." Benji laughed while nodding, "yea I guess she's too cool for school, to be bothered with us common folks anymore Jess." Beca scoffed playfully, "I mean sure a long time ago but I don't care for that anymore. I'm sure I'll never be too cool for you guys." They all laughed together for a bit as she continued on. "I'm also pretty sure Stacie will get bored of me soon enough and go on to her next conquest." Beca said shrugging her shoulder and started to munch on her peas. Jesse looked up from his magazine towards the cheerleaders table and shook his head smiling. "No doubt she will but I'm guessing another red headed cheerleader has other ideas in mind." He said nodding his head towards a certain red head staring longly at Beca but looking away every few seconds, to not alert the other cheerleaders. Beca scrunched her eyebrows in confusion and looked where Jesse suggested. As soon as her and Chloe locked eyes, they smiled secretly at each other. It's been a few weeks of rehearsals and seeing each other every now and again. Chloe has been busy lately, beca has as well. I mean if you count all the doctor check ups as busy. Chloe on the other hand is having cheerleading practices and up holding her status as the most popular girl in school. Beca has noticed that she pulled back a bit from talking to her in public eye of her other peers. Beca doesn't mind at least they're not so attached anymore. Don't get Beca wrong, she liked spending all her time with Chloe. It's just that she doesn't want to get too attached to her, she is basically hanging on to loaned time anyways. Beca looked away from Chloe with a shake of her head. "No, she's got a boyfriend Jess. I don't want to be in a relationship anyways. I literally don't have time for them." Beca said smiling ruefully at her lunch plate. Suddenly she wasn't hungry anymore, "Hey guys uh I'll see ya later yeah?" She stood up and said her goodbyes and quickly exited out of the cafeteria. Jesse and Benji both looked at each other confused.

As soon as Chloe saw Beca look away from her, she slightly frowned but shook it off. All her friends were talking about their cheer practice routine and their boyfriends. Chloe has never been this bored in her life, but nonetheless smiling and nodding. She sighed while looking back over at Beca, she frowned when she saw Beca leave in a haste. She was about to get up and go after her but her boyfriend came up behind her. "Hey babe! I was wondering if you wanted to come to my party after the big game tonight?" Tom asked her, putting his arm around her shoulder and smiling at all the other cheerleaders charmingly. Of course they all swooned at Tom's oh so charming smile, she could care less though as she saw the door shut behind Beca. She sighed slightly and put on her winning smile and said yes.

Beca has been having more seizures lately, she knows it's because of the stress. Trying to be a normal teenager is harder than it looks. Knowing every day could be your last then going to a math class seemed pointless to her. She doesn't know why she keeps doing it, maybe so her dad can sleep easy at night. I guess he thinks that if she at least tries to live a normal life she will eventually have one. Beca doesn't think life works like that. Sometimes you get the shit end of the stick, that's just how it works and you can't do anything about it. Beca is currently walking off campus to the football field. She's not gonna lie and say she isn't going to do something incredibly dumb. After lunch she always sees some drug deal happen on this stupid field. Right now she just wants something to take the edge off. She will take anything at this point. I guess you could say she has been doing drugs since she first got diagnosed. At the age of fifteen she has been doing any drugs she could get her hands on. She stopped about two years when she hit the age of seventeen. You could say it got to the point where her dad sent her to seven months in rehab. As she walked under the bleachers she could see about five students inhaling into a bag. She smiled as she head their way, classic inhalants. You can't go wrong with those puppies. "Hey how much for a hit?" They all turned their heads her way, smiling goofily. The leader walked up to her unsteadily, almost tripping over his own feet. "A-About fifteen bucks-" he started chuckling to himself out of now where. Beca dug into her pockets and pulled out a twenty, the guy snatched it out of her hand and gave her the bag he was inhaling out of. "It's defiantly worth the extra five m'lady." He slurred while stumbling his way back to his friends, grabbing one of their bags. Beca rolled her eyes, it better be worth the extra five. She started at the bag for a minute, it's only an inhalant. Not as bad as what she's used too. "You gonna do it or what?" One of the girls next to the leader said. Beca cleared her throat and put the bag up to her nose and mouth and deeply inhaled. As soon as her third inhale she felt a euphoric feeling, slowly sliding down the wall and onto the ground. She breathed out, smiling so big she felt her face crack. "Feels good don't it? Josh gets the good shit. Hey, aren't you the new girl?" Beca slowly lolled her head to the side on which she just barely now noticed a girl sat beside her on the grass. All Beca could focus on was her distinctive green eyes. (This is her by the way, just so you guys have a visual)