herc pov
As I sat on what some would call I sofa and stared at John i was set on figuring out some way to save this situation, some way to help him like I had too many times. my mind was as numb as he looked, sitting their head in hands while the commotion thrived around him. my hand had stayed on his back for the majority of the time, asking questions like "what happened?" and "are you alright?" at an endless loop to no answer, laf was doing far better at being a friend than I was. he was absolutely wild about the situation, whatever their situation was, it seemed more than just a couples row.. sometimes I wish I knew French. through their conversation laf gave me a needy look, the one I know a bit too well, the "please do something" look. so I'm guessing my consoling came to no avail. guess I should really act on this.
I stood up quietly and held out my hand to john, staring at him for however long it took for the hurt boy to get up, which eventually earned me a worried glare. but nonetheless, he got up anyway, taking my hand and walking slowly. I slowly lead him through the room to the door, avoiding alexander for his sake. giving laf a nod, I opened to door and lead him to our dorm to cool down because if nothing would help him, solitude would. he quietly sat down on our sofa emitting a distant hum and looked up at me
"thanks.."
"its okay, you can watch some tv and calm down for a bit, there are biscuits in the cupboard, I'm going to find out what the hell is going on if that's fine"
he gave me a faint smile and a satisfied nod, I think I've done well. now to find out what the actual fuck is going on with Alex.
I walk through the door to the same argument ive seen before, accept abruptly stopping the moment I walk in.
"Alright, what happened,"I say blatantly, walking to both of them with a pretty annoyed stare.
"Alex you better tell him or I will" laf snapped
the small man stood pretty tall but that faded in about a second at laf's words, I was kinda done with it too if I'm honest.
with a heavy sigh and al eyes on him he began his explanation "well Laurens wanted to know everything about me and one thing led to another and now he is on about Jefferson, which he shouldn't need to kno-"
"Alex."laf interrupted sternly with a look of stone
"..which I don't want to tell him. look he shouldn't be that annoyed about i-"
"ALEX."
"...he should be that annoyed about it because of I guess his involvement with Jefferson, yeah yeah alright. but he wants to know my whole life story!" a defensive hamilton uttered to me.
I stared at them both because honestly what. all because Hamilton couldn't confess something, I bet it wasn't even that bad too that man is as stubborn as a mule, I'm honestly surprised but as fed up as Lafayette is.
"Alright so what happened with Jefferson, can't you just tell him?"
"Mon Cheri, you don't know? well-"
"I'll tell him, well I would do, erm.. favors for Jefferson" he sighed awkwardly "but only so he would date Eliza for a bit, to..help her get over our breakup.."
"favors?" this better not be what I think it is, I should've read those dam texts
"ohmygod SEXUAL favors " WOW ANYONE BUT HAMILTON WHAT DID I EXPECT
"you could've just paid him you know" I tried to say casually, wanting to say anything but the nonsense I was thinking of him
"I was pretty broke back then.."
"when was 'back then'...?" don't you dare tell me he-
"..a few months go" fuck me back to hell with a chainsaw
"July!" laf chimed in.
"wait and you guys were still?" hmmmmmmm hoe don't do it
"yes yes...but it was only to keep him dating Eliza, you know how she is with breakups, or at least Peggy does, but yeah, obviously it came to a stop when John ...yeah Eliza is pissed" oh my god
"wait did you like it? is that why everyone says-"
"someone found us once alright, it was nothing, it meant nothing I had to god I wish I had never done it fucking hell"
"so you cheated" on my John, I can't believe this
"look it was only like twice a month and I didn't even like it"
"it?" MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
"you know the sexual favour-"
"BLOWJOBS" lafayette shouted in
"LAFAYETTE WHAT THE FUCK"
"YOU WERE NEVER GOING TO SAY IT"
"well I mean at least it wasnt..so you kinda sorta cheated every month..."
"to make Eliza happy!"
"that doesn't make it any better...you know you could lose john over this, why would you even-"
"look I'm sorry I'm so fucking stupid I fucking know! I know..." he covered his face with shaking hands, me and laf looking at him with sympathy but little respect, he is going to have to tell John and its really going to break him.
"you need to tell him, you know that right?"
"of course I fucking do..not now, not like this I couldn't"
"mon frere, I really love you and all but this is...how you say...cheating. its cheating and you must tell him sometime!"
"yeah...just give me some time... I just..i don't want to face it...that sounds so cowardly but I just can't, not right now, it'll only hurt him more." I can at least agree with that one
and with that we parted, making the decision to stay in our normal dorms for once, me making the trip with laf to tell John what was happening, leaving Hamilton and me, as burr was staying around Theodosia's.
me and laf opened the door, he was holding my hand pretty tight, I was holding his tighter, I could tell he needed to and it broke my heart. we came into John on the sofa.
his curls framed around his face, red, puffy and wet, his shivering body curled into a ball on the sofa an unexplainable dark image yet completely understandable to me. I mean I've had arguments before and while they don't break me so much, I know how much John cares. he really needs to grieve...hell needs to grieve much more when Alex tells him...Jesus Christ alive.
laf takes his jacket off and sighs while I sit next to John to tell him where he's going to be sleeping, maybe it'll provide some comfort.
"John?"
he rolls around to face me pretty close, glazed puffy eyes and everything I couldn't see clearly was pretty clear now. he had to take a deep breath to respond -
"I heard everything."
((AHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHHA PLOT TWISTTTTT ALSO I CHANGED THE PICTURE TO THE LAST CHAPTER TO SOMETHING BETTER AND MULETTE OH AND ALSO I WENT TO SEE A MUSICAL CALLED "EVERYBODYS TALKING ABOUT JAMIE"It's BRITISH AND AMAZING, it's ON SPOTIFY I RECOMMEND LISTENING. IT IS ABOUT A BOY WHO WANTS TO BE A DRAG QUEEN, ITS SUPER DIVERSE THE BOY IS GAY WITH A MUSLIM FRIEND AND THERE IS A SADTM SONG ANYWAY THX FOR READING I WILL HAVE ANOTHER CHAPTER SOON, WHEN I SAID ANGST I MEANT IT))
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helpless crush || lams fluff fanfic HAMILTON
Romancejohn has a deep crush on his hardworking classmate Alexander, this semester, they have to sit together in tech...and they get talking! (college au fluff angst) Alex is an awkwardguy and hardworking flirt who survives on his sQuAd and coffee john Lau...
