3:12 am | Dazai Osamu

21. Bliss

"We loved with a love that was more than love."

Edgar Allan Poe

By the time (Y/N) and I stepped inside of our shared apartment, we were already both panting because of the make out session, that "accidentally" started back in the corridor. Once we finally managed to enter, I pinned her to the wall, not being able to hold back anymore, and sucked on her neck to leave numerous hickeys and bite marks, while roaming my hands all over her body. (Y/N) was whimpering and moaning quietly, trying to stay quiet, as she was pulling me closer and closer to her because simple touches and kisses were not enough for both of us already.

Soon, I found myself with an unbuttoned shirt as my jacket was already thrown somewhere behind us.

Was (Y/N) indeed going to become completely mine in less than an hour? This felt a little unrealistic. I was just being honest with myself: 1) my body is ugly under my bandages; it's covered with many purple and even yellow marks, scars that will never leave and I even had some fresh wounds so did she really wanted...this? 2) life with me is not peaceful and lovely. My life has always been dark, terrifying and painful and the worst was that it could hardly be changed by now and (Y/N) knew that. Does she really want to share this unbearable pain with me?

"Osamu, please~" she moaned, waking me up from my thoughts

(Y/N) was melting under my touches and now, she kept begging me for something, being too embarrassed to actually say what was that, but she didn't even need to because I knew what she was going to ask for. I finally decided that it was enough teasing for her and she was wet enough to proceed.

"Are you excited, kitten~?" I asked her, wrapping her legs around my waist and lifting her up as she instantly wrapped her arms around my neck for more support

I carried her to the bedroom, while covering her neck with gentle, mouth-opened kisses from time to time. Actually, I was ready to go to the main part right there in the corridor already, but it was her first time so I couldn't let myself do that. I wanted her first time to be memorable, gentle and loving. I wanted to show her how much I adored her and how much I longed to finally be able to kiss her.

"I am~" She replied, blushing slightly "Maybe even a little too much because of your teasing~"

"Mhm~" I hummed, laying her down on the bed and hovering over her "Someone seems to be so confident during their first time~ I wonder if you'll stay the same till the end~"

I reached over for the zipper of her dress on her back and pulled it down, unzipping the dress. (Y/N)'s face was slowly becoming redder and her cocky smirk was gone the moment her dress was taken off.

She had a gorgeous body. I felt so bad, that my dictionary was too poor to describe the beauty, that I was seeing right in front of me:

The beauty of her cheeks, covered in bright red because of the embarrassment and eagerness.
The beauty of her skin with some purple bruises, that will take a lot of time to heal, because of the horrible treatment by Hamada and her mom.
The beauty of her eyes, that looked at me with the blind trust and clear feeling of love.
And the beauty of her soul, that couldn't even be compared to the beauty of nature because it was much more beautiful.

I made sure to take my time now.

Despite all her moans, whimpers and begs for me to stop teasing her, I slowly kissed every single spot on her body, making "stops" on her bruises or scars. I knew, that my kisses might have been ticklish, but I must have done that. Her body is the piece of art, created by the miracle of life, and I wouldn't forgive myself if I wasn't treating it the way I should have.