Stranger

ch11

Silence is not valued enough. 

You can disagree with me all the fuck you want, but it's true. Just ask the ones that agree with me. It's fucking bliss and very much needed. I had always preferred it to anything else there is. Maybe it has to do with the loner lifestyle I have had, but that's besides the point now. And once you get used to one specific type of living your life, it's hard to come out of it. Here's where the surprise lies. 

Evie. 

She has gotten me used to not sit alone, to not lock everyone one. Well, I still do, not her though. I know, I know, I'm becoming soft and fucking mushy and what not, but somehow it happened before I could notice it. 

Never, and I mean never in my fucking lifetime, did I expect to become friends with someone out of my crew, so to speak, let alone a human. I have a hard time trusting demons around me, but not Evie, never Evie. It's weird and I can't explain it. 

She managed to creep up on me, get me to tolerate her and enjoy her company, while being annoying, crazy, silly and everything else. Fuck, like I liked her. Fucking shit, what is happening to me? 

Fine, I did like her. She's nice, for fucks sake! No matter what she does, her heart is always in the right place and no matter how hard I try, I just can't get myself to hate her for that! That's what she does to you, the dooming combination of annoying and nice gets you and sinks its teeth before you can say otherwise. 

And she also admitted that she likes spending time with me. Me, out of all people. But maybe there never were any other people. The way she got excited yesterday as we walked to school, because, believe it or not, Bryan had a car problem, stupid, I know, and admit that she was always alone on this road stroke a cord within me. 

I always pictured her in a group of friends, loved and adored by everyone around her and me as her project of the year. But, in that moment, for a short period of time, I had glimpsed into her true self. The Evie that she hid was locked deep inside, hidden from the world, hidden from the pain others can inflict on her, the words and insults that can get to her. And I saw myself in her. 

Being pushed away and forced into hiding was something I never imagined happening to me, but it did. And when the time came, no one, except my mother, was there to help me through it. My family became distant, my cousins had a fearful look in their eyes when they had to see me, others outside forgot about me, my friends continued their lives without me and I was stuck in a spot. A dark, clouded spot that no one paid attention to. 

But, Evie did. She somehow saw beyond all this shadow I put on and decided to stay even when I'd threaten her. Maybe she had recognized herself in me too, even if she wasn't aware of it at the time.

It's funny how humans have this sort of empathic sense in them and they let it guide them into the unknown, trusting it blindly. I always found it stupid and idiotic, the whole going with the flow thing, but for once, I was grateful about it. It had brought Evie to me and I couldn't hate on it for this.

Ok, too much reflecting was going on and I needed to get out of bed. And my head. And this feelings shit. 

Bryan and Marie were back home, underworld home I mean. Father had called an emergency meeting with them, for what I had no idea and neither did mom, but I couldn't care less. Also, it's been a while since they saw their families and that's why I'm having the weekend to myself. 

I am surprised that father is letting me all alone here, without any supervision, but maybe mom finally got to him and convinced him to have a bit of faith in me. I wasn't going to do anything really, as strange as that sounds, and I also was grateful for a little peace, not having someone looking over me all the time.