Phil's POV
I did the only thing I knew to do.
I hugged him.
I pulled him towards me and wrapped my arms around his torso.
He wrapped his arms around my stomach, like a little kid.
He buried his face into my shoulder, chanting the words 'I'm sorry'.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
"Dan, you have nothing to be sorry for. You're so strong. You're doing so well. I'm so proud of you."
I felt his arms fall limply to his sides, and I broke the hug.
"Dan, tell me what's going on in your head.", I spoke, not expecting a reply.
But I got one.
"Everyday, it's like, I shouldn't eat. 'Cause I'm used to it, you know? It's hard to break a habit. I'm telling myself that if I eat, then I'll gain weight. Each bite takes me further and further away from being the goal. Sometimes, the voice creeps in, screaming. I can't fight that. So I have to stop eating. But today-"
Dan paused, and I saw his hands fidgeting furiously.
Wrapping my hands around his, I used my thumb to stroke over his knuckles gently.
I'm here.
This seemed to calm him slightly, and he continued.
"Today- I'm not thinking about it, This isn't me. I can't fight it." He looked up at me, eyes red, lip quivering. "This isn't me. I'm not- This isn't-"
His hands were shaking in mine.
"I want to punch my head. Stop it hurting. I want it to stop. Make it stop." He slipped down onto the floor, his hands leaving mine and wrapping themselves around his head.
I sat down next to him and rested my head on his shoulders, hugging him in a way I remember doing before.
"There's nothing to be scared of. It won't hurt you. I won't let it."
YOU ARE READING
Bring Me Home // Phan
FanfictionDan is secretly suffering from depression. On the outside he seems bubbly and happy, but on the inside he wishes for it to all be over. When his friend, Phil, unexpectedly invites him to stay at his apartment, Dan struggles to keep up the glass that...
