Don't Fail Me [Boy X Boy]

♡Thirty-Nine♡

Kas P.O.V
I sighed as I felt Ian's soft breath on my chest with the light snore that happened occasionally. What am I doing? I've hurt him so much because I don't have a stable family. I just want everyone to stop hurting because of me. I don't wanna be that guy that makes him sad or makes him cry again... sigh. I'm willing to die for his happiness and maybe that's what he needs. My father will come back and who knows about my mother. He's everything I couldn't be but I have to pick up the pieces and burry them deep. I just want to be free. How can I sleep at night when there's a war inside my head? I can't hide him from the tears I shed every night he will see my pain sooner or later. I can hide but I can never leave. It's like I'm looking through a window that I want to be a door. It's hard to fight when you're born in the middle. There's only so much I can save and I want Ian to be one. I just want to let go. I can't hide in this pretty home forever. I love him but I hate myself. So how can I lie to him everyday? Everyone judges me hell Ian probably judges me and I realize everyday that he is the one that saves me but he shouldn't have to. He doesn't owe me anything! Keep holding on... just keep holding on... Remember ,
Fake It Till You Make It