I'm Not Your Toy

Tunnel vision

Please read the first book (Messy)in this series before reading this book.

Recap
Lauren starts prepping her work station by refilling a few bottles for mixers and setting aside things for garnishes. Her coworker finally finishes his shift and it's time for Lauren to take over. She starts with the only order her coworker couldn't complete before he had to leave- whiskey on the rocks, what an easy start to a long evening at work.

She pours the drink and pushes it towards the customer, while simultaneously catching the eye of another customer that is trying to flag her down from the opposite end of the bar. "Whiskey on the rocks? Had a long day, huh?" She prompts her customer as they look at the drink and accept it.

"Yeah, something like that." The female returns with a familiar voice. Lauren's eyes finally drift from the other customer to find out if she actually knows the woman. The second her eyes hit the female's face, Lauren's body goes numb.

"Holy shit." Is all that escapes her in a quiet voice. It was just loud enough for the customer to hear, and wanting to know what's going on, she looks up from her drink for the first time. The first thing she sees are those enchanting green eyes and then she feels her brain practically shut down on itself and melt into a puddle on the ground.

"Lauren?" Camila asks in a quiet voice, similar to Lauren's before. Their eyes remain stuck on each other and the younger of the two feels obligated to say something, anything, to explain why what happened was the way things went down between the two of them. The only problem is that nothing wants to come out.

And now welcome to the new book ❤️

After what feels like way too long, Lauren's eyes flicker back to the customer that is dying for her attention. This seems to snap her out of it long enough for her to walk over and take his request.

She continues roaming around the bar, running from customer to customer. Thankfully, the years of working behind a bar have paid off and she starts working by instinct because her head is pounding and she is getting tunnel vision.

Everything starts to feel better after a while. The headache is still there, but is significantly lighter and the tunnel vision is gone. Wet martini? Easy. She grabs the bottle of dry vermouth and moves back to her station to pour, but she notices movement in the area of the bar that she has been avoiding. Lauren's breathing begins to pick up and heartbeat is racing even faster than before. This isn't real. She isn't here, she is gone and this is all in your goddamn head, Lauren. It takes everything in her to ignore the feeling of somebody sitting there and not look in that direction.

This has happened before, but not in a while. She continues to ignore that section because Camila isn't really there, she keeps telling herself. She just has to get through this shift. The wave of customers at 10 has passed and it should be smooth sailing from here, just a few of the common late-nighters.

Since things are moving slow now, she has time to clean up a little. She goes through her routine, refill mixers, prep more fruits and garnishes, wipe down the counters on her side of the bar, and all that's left is wash a few of the glasses.

She scans the room while drying off her last glass and catches a glimpse of brown. Brown hair and brown eyes to be exact. Not an ugly brown, but the most enticing color she has ever seen.

Then it hits. Reality is a cruel motherfucker. She really did feel the eyes following her all night. Every weird feeling that Lauren has felt tonight kicks in at once, the pounding headache, tunnel vision, fast heartbeat, and heavy breathing. The more she breathes, the heavier her chest feels and all she needs is more oxygen, but it feels like it is leaving her body with every breath she takes.

Now all that's left is black. Lauren can't see anything but feels her body as it falls to the ground. There's nothing she can do about it. She can still hear everything that is going on, the glass that was in her hands shattering on the ground. The scrambling of chairs and the door of her boss's office slamming open as he runs in to see what happened.

Time runs slowly when you are no longer in control of your body. Every word directed towards her sounds like it is being said in slow motion.

She feels hands on her shoulders, trying to help regain her consciousness. This all feels all too familiar for some reason. "I can take her to the hospital if she wakes up, sir. She is going to need stitches for the cut on her hand." The feeling of pressure on her hand becomes noticeable. Why does this feel like it's happened before? That voice and the darkness at the same time.

The lights turn on, the gears start shifting again, and the world comes back. Lauren wakes up and is offered a glass of juice by her boss. "Welcome back, badass. We're going to need to get you to the ER for that nasty cut on your hand. You're bleeding all over my bar." He says laughing and helps the girl to her feet.

She should be feeling the pain in her palm, there is definitely a lot of blood even though it has been covered by a bar rag, but with everything coming back to her, she's a little overwhelmed at the moment.

"Lauren, this young lady offered to take you for me." She knows he is referring to Camila but cannot make herself look at the girl. If she looks at her, she will feel the painful shattering of her heart again. "I can't exactly leave the bar unattended right now." He reasons and gestures towards the several customers in the building.

The pain kicks in and her hand instinctively covers the rag, putting more pressure on it.

"Lauren, can I please take you to the ER, you need to get that looked at right now." All she can do in response is nod.

Now she remembers the last time she has felt like this. This happened after Ty, when the girls helped her in those months afterwards. Once again, it feels like she has left her body and is holding on by a thread. Except that once life-saving thread feels like it is pushing her down the cliff of another spiral with its mere presence. That thread has a name, and its name is Camila.