I woke up. It was my first weekend but everything was already messed up. I was sat down, leaning on the door, with Yukhei doing god knows what at the other side of the door. I touched my face and felt all the dried tears I released from last night. I stood up and decided to walk around the garden of the school.
As I walked on the paved pathway in the garden. Different scents of flowers filled my nose. I decided to sit down on the grass, with my arms wrapped my legs as I thought about what happened last night.
I just lost my brother. He was the only one I had left and now he's gone, because of me.
As I was deep in thought, I felt footsteps stepping on the grass to my direction. I looked up and saw a confused Jungwoo.
"What are you doing here and— wait we're you crying?"
He asked
"N-No, I wasn't. I'm fine"
"I can hear from your voice you just cried. Tell me what happened"
I sighed deeply. I could trust him right?
"Y-Yukhei, I lost him. We had a fight yesterday"
Jungwoo kept on staring at me, indicating for me to continue
"I got home yesterday and saw him cutting himself. I tried helping him but he told me to not get near him. That was when he lost his temper. He started yelling at me about how it was always my fault that he would end up broken. He even threw things at me. I couldn't do anything else but leave"
"B-But then, where did you stay the night at?"
"I slept in front of our dorm room, leaning on the door.
Please, we need to help Yukhei. He isn't himself"
I asked desperately
"Fine, but we have to get you somewhere first. Come, you can stay at mine and Taeyong hyung's room."
"Is it really gonna be fine for him?"
"You got a valid reason. Plus, I have to talk to the boys about this"
"Uhm, alright"
We both stood up and walked through the hallways to Jungwoo and Taeyong's dorm. My head was hung low that whole time we were walking.
Soon, we reached their dorm
"Welcome to our home"
Jungwoo said before opening the door. There wasn't much difference to their dorm from our dorm. Just a few different objects used to decorate the room, nothing weird. I looked around the cozy room as my eyes landed on the kitchen area. It was Taeyong cooking something. He faced our direction right after he heard the door closing, not expecting me to be there with Jungwoo.
"What is she doing here?"
He asked with a frown, putting the utensil he was holding down.
"Things aren't going well at their dorm" Jungwoo answered
"What?"
"Her and Yukhei got into a fight after she tried stopping him from cutting himself. He was apparently yelling at her and throwing things to her so she ended up sleeping outside their dorm and I saw her sitting on the grass at the garden"
Jungwoo said
"Oh. Well, sorry for that I guess." Taeyong said
"Can't you cook her something?"
"You do know she can't eat human food"
"right"
Jungwoo answered immediately
They let me sit down with them as they ate lunch while I was consuming some energizer. Oil.
"I'll go out with Jaehyun"
Taeyong said
"You're coming too?"
Jungwoo asked
"What do you mean?"
"Are you also coming to the movie night?"
"Oh yeah"
Taeyong answered before the both of them looked at me
"Do you want to come with us?" Jungwoo asked
"Oh, no. I'll just stay here. It may be a boys' night after all."
"Just make sure you don't steal anything in here"
"Taeyong!"
Jungwoo said
"What?"
"You know what let's just go, we're all ready anyways"
Jungwoo said before pulling Taeyong to the door
"Bye Yuri!"
He waved at me with a smile before closing the door
I sighed as I looked around the room. Yukhei could've been hanging out with them if it wasn't because of me. I layed down on the couch. I might as well just clean the place.
After a few hours of cleaning. Yes, hours of cleaning. The door opened revealing Jungwoo, Taeyong, Jaehyun, Sicheng, Mark, Ten and Doyoung.
"Yuri" Jaehyun said as I looked at him
"We heard about what happened" I looked down. Why did they have to know without me?
"We've come to a conclusion to send Yukhei to some mental hospital"
I quickly looked up as I heard the word mental hospital. They are NOT gonna send my brother there.
"No. He's not even crazy"
"But he knows you're fragile and yet continued to hurt you"
"But he's broken!"
"And that's what we're trying to fix here"
"Please, he's your friend you can't do that to him"
"We know but we're only gonna try to recover hi—"
"Then why does it have to be in a mental hospital?!" I snapped
"Y-Yuri" Sicheng comforted me
I looked down, biting on my lips trying to prevent myself from crying. They're pretty much slapping the truth to me. The truth that I was the one at fault for that to happen to Yukhei. I released myself from Sicheng's grip as I walked quietly to the bathroom and closed the door.
I sat down the floor and hugged myself, leaning my head on the wall as tears flowed down my cheeks. Everything that's happening right now is affecting me too much. I'm too guilty. I want to break myself. As I was deep in my thought, the door opened harshly revealing Taeyong with a serious look. But his face softened when he saw the state I was in.
"What are you doing?" He asked, crouching down in front me
"C-Can't , can't I just deactivate myself now? I've done too much already. I got rid of your friend. I lost him. I broke him. I'm the fake one here, I should be the one experiencing what he's feeling right now since I'll disappear soon anyways."
"W-What? No, you can't do that. Listen here, we're not sending Yukhei to the mental hospital as a crazy patient. We have a friend who works there who could help Yukhei. He'll be separated from the other patients. Just trust us on this"
He said as he hugged me to comfort me. I never thought I would need this until now. Not even from Taeyong.
"I'm sorry if I acted too much on you. I never thought you felt like this that whole time. I thought you were just a robot who was living off somebody else's life. Well, I guess that was until I saw you getting picked on. Both of the incidents? I saw them all. What do you think would I be doing in the pool that time?"
"W-What?"
I asked him confusingly
"You'll know more soon. Come, let's eat with the boys"
"F-Fine, I guess."
I said hesitatingly before standing up and walking back to the dining area with Taeyong.
The rest of the day went on well. I was able to make up with Jaehyun. Jungwoo also let me sleep in his room as he slept in Taeyong's room. I couldn't get comfortable on the bed enough though. I was thinking too much about Yukhei. What could he be doing by now?
