Hopeful and Hopeless

Nine.

"You see, idealism detached from action is just a dream. But idealism allied with pragmatism, with rolling up your sleeves and making the world bend a bit, is very exciting. It's very real. It's very strong." - Bono

Wednesday, March 21st, 2018

"THIS COLOUR IS SO CUTE," TILLY SAYS, leaning over her leg, painting her toes with a nice light pink colour. I have taken a few days off to stay at home with Tilly while she's suspended. Willa is helping out at the cafe today and my staff are perfectly capable by themselves which helps me a lot. "If only I had a second set of toes to paint." She adds, sending me into a laughing fit.

She has always had a pretty easygoing approach to her situation. From the get-go, she accepted that this is the way that life was going to be from then on and she got through it. I know it does upset her though, even if she doesn't like to show it.

A knock on the door interrupts us and I turn to look at the door, unsure if there was really a knock. I wasn't expecting anyone to come over today. Unless something went wrong at the cafe? No, Willa would've called me.

There is another knock so I stand up quickly. I awkwardly shuffle over to the door, trying my best to keep my toes apart so that my nail polish doesn't smudge. I swing the door open, revealing two, very tall guys in front of me.

"Julian? Lukas?" I ask, taken aback. I've never seen either of them together before, I didn't think they really knew each other that well.

"Hey." They say in unison. Weird.

I step out of the doorway, "Come in." Me just standing there not saying anything may have come off a little rude.

Lukas steps in but Julian just stays where he his, "I was just dropping him off." He gestures to the two of us and gives me a little wink. Thankfully, Lukas doesn't see. I poke my tongue out at him and close the door. Lukas is looking around my apartment and I find myself feeling pretty self-conscious. After going to his mansion of a house, my little two bedroom apartment is extremely underwhelming.

"It's not much, but its home," I tell him as he continues to look around the place. Why is he even here anyway?

"I love it. It's cute." Cute. I know he means in a good way but I can't help but think what he's saying is slightly condescending. Especially considering where he comes from. "No I really mean it, I really love it. It has a personality which I can't say about my house." He emphasises and I smile proudly, looking around.

I am proud of my little apartment, though I would prefer something bigger. But I worked hard to afford this and everything in it, which makes me proud.

"Luke?" Tilly says from the couch and he quickly turns around to face her.

"Tilly! How are you?" He rushes into the living room, joining her on the lounge. He glances to the nail polish in her hand then down to her toes, then back up to her face.

"I'm doing good, I get a week off school." She says proudly and I scoff.

"You were suspended, Tilly." I remind her.

"It's not my fault!" She defends herself, putting her hands up in surrender.

"Wow, I didn't take you for the type to get suspended." Lukas relaxes into the couch next to her. I join the two of them, sitting on the other side of Tilly.

"She isn't. She just had a few unfortunate run-ins with a mean girl." I inform him and he grimaces.

"Right. That's rough. Man, I'm glad I went to an all-boys high school. Girls are a lot of work." Lukas tells us. Both of us scoff and look to each other.