Jeff x Ben-Dirty Mind

•20

*Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock.*

I frantically knocked on Ben's door. Hope in my mind as I eagerly awaited him to answer.

Maybe Devon was just trying to freak me out. Maybe he was just messing with me.

I smiled wearily at that and gulped as the door opened Revealing a normal looking Ben. I was half expecting him to be crying, or have, like, red and puffy eyes, but it's the normal pale shade that his skin has always been.

"Hi." He said with a small smile.

"H-Hey." I breathed out as I stretched and cracked my knuckles.

"I missed you, baby, ~" I breathed out in my drunken accent. Even though I've only been gone for a few hours...

I played with Smile Dog longer than I thought...

"Yeah. I missed you too," He said in a monotoned voice. I cocked an eyebrow at him as I hugged him. He hugged back like he normally would and slide his hand up my neck and through my hair. I smirked as I wanted to feel his soft lips against my neck but when he brushed away my hair he immediately froze.

Is that why he did that? Did he know?

I froze too, as I remembered what exactly was hiding behind my hair... He backed up and covered his mouth with his hand. His eyes were wide and full of shock and... Pain.

"B-Ben. I-It's not what it looks like. Let me at least explain this a little." I gulped as I said so and rubbed the back of my neck...

It is exactly what it looks like though...

He gulped and his eyes were slightly watery as I took a few steps closer to him and gently stroked his cheek. I gripped his wrist gently and pulled him closer as I softly kissed his knuckles and held his waist. He blushed a little and looked down.

"O-Okay," He said in a shaky voice like he could break down at any moment if I said the wrong thing.

I can tell he's probably been cheated on in past relationships because of how he reacted. I bet he would've shut down if I had stayed quiet for a second longer and even lash out at me.

We walked over onto the couch and he sat cross-legged in front me and fiddled with his fingers. We were facing each other and I gulped as I wanted to sound strong and sure of myself. He didn't look me in the eyes at first, but when he did, he was blank. He had close to no emotion and stayed strong. I gulped. I knew he would be able to tell if I lied to him at all at this moment so I decided to stay truthful.

"I-uh... ran into Devon... my ex, and I am so pissed drunk." I chuckled and looked down as I shook my head. I looked back up at him. His expression hasn't changed.

"I-Uh, I wasn't in right of mind. I was d-drunk and he knows how like... vulnerablatilityyyyy and emotionalyyy I can be when I'm drunk and he took advantage of that I guess." I gritted out the last few words because it did truly make me angry but I think I slurred my words a bit, I am so much drunker than I seem right now.

I rolled my eyes, getting tired of how dramatic this was. I wasn't good at explaining things, like my feelings.

"Look, I didn't cheat on you though, okay?" I said as I looked up at him with hope and placed my hand over his. My voice was as raspy as ever, and I hoped that affected what he would say.

I paused as I got flashes from the night Devon showed up on my doorstep.

I cheated on Ben over and over with him that night. He fucked me senseless and I let him do it. I wanted him to do it. I can't believe I forgot about that.