Two Paths, One Fate (Drarry fanfiction)

Nightmares and Shattered Glass

Draco's P.O.V

I woke up, gasping. My chest was damp with sweat. The nightmares did not stop. They kept on going. Haunting recollections of the past. Of the war. Of the dark mark.
I always kept a diary. I wrote what happened in my nightmares into the diary.

The nightmare I had tonight was quite an uncommon one. It was of the dark mark. I decided to write it down.

"I don't want to have it." Draco's desperate voice pleaded to Lucius. 
"You must Draco. Come on now. You don't want to keep the dark Lord waiting do you?" Lucius said, yanking Draco's arm.
'Where are we going?"
"Borgin and Burkes."
Draco shrieked the whole way.
Eventually, tired Lucius, shoved Draco into the cold, hard wall, knocking Draco out.
Draco was awoken by the rain. He was outside Borgin and Burkes.

I shook, remembering that horrible day. The nightmares. The memories. The pain.
How many mistakes have I made? 
I was one of them. I had been a deatheater.
It was very dark. It must have been quite early in the morning.
I looked through my diary. I stared at my spidery writing, my haunting pictures. I looked at picture of a gravestone. The grave said Fred on it. 
I held back guilty tears. I was there at the funeral of Fred Weasley. I had stood at the back, in the shadows, weeping silently.
It was my fault. I was a death eater. I was partly to blame for his death.

I could not live like this.
I stared at another picture of a crowd of people. It was when Voldemort thought that Harry was dead but he was not. Voldemort called me over to join the death eaters and I did.
I am a coward. I had stood there for a moment. I was not going to move. But something inside me forced me to move. Perhaps it was my family. 
If I took the side of Hogwarts, Voldemort would have killed my parents. I am a horrible person.

I flicked through the diary and saw my pictures and my written down nightmares. 
The vanishing cabinet. The astronomy tower. The dark mark. Slytherin. The cursed necklace. Poison. Dumbledore. Voldemort. War.

I could not look any longer. So much stuff I had done wrong. So much damage I had caused. I can't not live the rest of my life, guilty like this.

I found it hard to get back to sleep, so I stayed awake until morning. I hated Malfoy Manor. This was the place where all the death eaters gathered. Where they planned and plotted to do wrong. The manor was a cold, dark, gloomy place.
Father had pleaded guilty to the ministry for being a deatheater. He had to pay a huge fine and will probably be sent to Azkaban soon. I'm not sure about mother. I hope she does not go. Then I will have no one. 

In a few days I will be going back to Hogwarts. I sighed with relief. But I am not happy. As soon as the Christmas holidays are over, I will go back to Hogwarts being treated like I always have been.
Wherever I go, someone hisses "Death eater" at me. I am not welcome there. I feel disconnected from my friends as well. 

The day was quite boring. Breakfast was very dull. I came back to my room and prepared all of my Hogwarts supplies. I don't know why I had unpacked them anyway. I was just so bored.
At dinner, I sat at the table.
Lucius Malfoy sat at one end and Narcissa Malfoy sat at the other end. I sat somewhere in the middle. It was quite a long table, which was unnecessary for 3 people to sit at. This is the table where the death eaters sat at. This is where Nagini, the snake of Voldemort slithered.
I felt sick.
I did not really listen to my parents' conversation.
father then said to me "Perhaps we need a new, smaller table." Lucius chuckled.
"Yeah. There aren't any deatheaters here anymore to sit here." I said coldly. 
"Draco." My mother scolded 
"What's that supposed to mean?" Said Lucius, his eyes reddening with rage.
Lucius let this go and started talking about the hearing.
"The ministry weren't listening to any of it." Lucius sighed.
Narcissa frowned. 
"I wonder why." I snapped.
My father gave me a death stare.
"If there's anything you want to say, then spit it out!" Lucius roared.
"Why would they listen to you? You were a deatheater. You supported Voldemort. You are partly the reason why so many people have died and you forced me to join something that I didn't want to just because you were too much of a coward to stand up against it!" I shouted, leaving the dinner table.
Lucius hissed in anger.

I began to storm off. My father then suddenly shot a hex at me.
It hit me in the back, sending me flying across the hall. I landed hard onto the floor, hitting my head.
My mother was screaming in the background.
With much strength, I got up. 
My father was shouting at me whilst I argued back.
He shot more curses at me which I blocked. He kept on shooting more spells at me, sparks flying everywhere.
One of the spells I blocked, deflected into the ceiling.
The chandelier overhead shook. I gasped.
My mother screamed in the background.
The chandelier fell from the ceiling.
I backed off, shouting.
So did my father.
The huge chandelier crashed onto the marble floor.
Shards of glass flew everywhere. A few scratched my face.
I ran upstairs, my body aching and bloody.  I hurriedly gathered my stuff.  I had my diary and Hogwarts supplies.

I took my trunk and stormed back downstairs.
My mother pleaded for me to stay. I said no. I refused to stay here any longer.
I walked out of the manor into the vast garden. It was dark and late at night. I did not know where to go, but as long as I was not here, I'd be fine. 

I walked off into the freezing cold night...