Nothing's Fine, I'm Torn.

Heart-breaking letter

After a while we arrived at a large white house with a black high fence around it. The house was in a neighborhood with only similar houses, it seemed like a quiet posh residential neighborhood. The house stood on a long dark road illuminated by streetlights which were ten meters apart from each other. I never thought Kristen would live in such an affluent neighborhood like this. Gently I shook  Kristen awake who was still with her head on my lap. Even as she slept she was beautiful, she looked so calm and peaceful like a little angel. She lay with her face to me and as she slept she had a sweet little smile on her face. "Kristen, sweetheart. We are there.." She made moaning sounds, mumbled something unintelligible and turned on her side so that she was facing the black leather chair. "Kristen, come on. Get up, we are also tired.." Laura started now to help me and leaned over the chair, since she was the one behind the wheel. Suddenly the gate of the house opened and a big figure started to walk towards us. Because it was very dark and there were only a few lampposts, the shape was black and we couldn't see his face. The figure came slowly up to the car and with every footstep he made you heard the stones of the path cracking. "Kristen, wake up! It's late.." Liam arc now on the chair and began to give with his hands small taps on her cheeks. Liam apparently had magic hands because in no time Kristen was awake and sat up straight. She looked through the windows outside and apparently got shocked of the dark sky filled with stars. "What? How long have I slept? What time is it?" She searched her clothes and dressed her with difficulty because we were still in the car. The black figure came closer and was almost to the car windows. "I asked you something! What time is it? "Kristen was impatient and in a somehow she started to panic. Liam glanced at the display of the car and compared it with his watch. "It is five past two." He smiled politely but I could see on his face that he was a little worried about Kristen who frantically grabbed all her stuff and looked frightened out the window. "Shit, my dad.."

Before Kristen could open the door pulled the man, who now stood in the light and had a white beard, the door already open. "Kristen? Are you crazy?" The man pulled Kristen on her arm out of the car. I saw the anger in his eyes and his hand began to squeeze harder. "Come on, let's go. NOW!" The man who was apparently her father pulled so hard that Kristen stuck with her shoe and fell right with her face on the stones. "Dad stop, please. Stop! You h-hurt me.." Kristen who came difficult from her words through the tears slowly tried to climb up but her legs were too weak and she fell to the ground. "Get up, now!" Her father started to pull her on the stones and they made a grinding sound on her legs. I crawled to the door to Kristen to help, but just before I could step out he was thrown close. "Stop stop, stop! Ouch!" Kristen began to cry harder and harder. It hurt me to see her like this, I wanted to help her but I couldn't. I was afraid, afraid of her father that he would hurt me. I looked at Liam and Laura who sat stiffened in their chair, apparently they were just as shocked as me because it was quiet in the car. My eyes began to fill with tears when I saw Kristen stand there in tears, helpless. "Kristen.." I pushed my hand against the window while a tear flowed on my cheek. "Go away! And do not come near my daughter ever again! Bunch of idiots, what were you thinking!" Her father gave a kick to the car and pointed with an angry face in a gesture that we had to leave. It took a while before Laura wake from her thoughts and started the car immediately. "Come on guys, we gotta go." Laura stepped on the gas and through the back window I saw it happen, Kristen who got one last slap in her face and got pushed further inside. The cry that followed after did break my heart, a cry of pain from the slap in her face by her own father.

I awoke in a cold empty room that was illuminated by the sun shining through the window. Slowly I crawled up and I wiped the sleep from my eyes, since I was very tired. Because of the incident last night I had hardly slept, every minute I woke up and saw the crying face of Kristen in front of me. I had never seen something so horrible like that, a father who hit his own child in the face. Somehow I felt guilty, guilty that I had not helped her. I had been cowardly, pathetic. Nobody deserved anything like what Kristen had yesterday. I sighed, grabbed my phone from under my pillow and turned to face the light blue painted wall. The gorgeous afternoon yesterday with Kristen was immediately ruined. How I was looking for her in the forest, how we sat together on the cliff, how we jumped down, how she hit her arms around me and especially how she kissed me. I turned my face so I looked at the white ceiling. The words of her father haunted in my head. What if I never could see Kristen ever again? How can I stay away from someone I love so much? A tear escaped from my eye and I felt it slowly slide down my cheek. I could not live without Kristen, yesterday it finally felt like that empty place in my heart was filled, as if we belonged together. I sighed, pulled the covers over my face and closed my eyes. I lay there for a while, thinking of nothing until I was startled by the doorbell. I waited a moment because Paul would probably open it but only three minutes later it rang again, so obviously I was home alone. In my boxers I crept down the stairs expectantly who would stand on the doorstep. I expected that there would stand someone at the door but instead there was a rolled up letter with a red ribbon wrapped around it. I took another step outside to see if there really was no one but when the drops began to fall from the sky I quickly shut the door.

In large black ornamental letters stood my name below the ribbon. I slowly slid the ribbon off and laid it down on the kitchen table. The adrenaline surged through my belly, I was afraid, but yet so excited. Apparently it would be an other invitation for a party or wedding. I rolled open the letter and put it on the table. I expected a long business letter but instead there was something short written by hand.

"Dear Harry,

I wanted you to know that yesterday afternoon I've had it really great with you. How we jumped from the cliff together, how we lay in the high grass, each moment with you was perfect. It felt like a big dream which came true.

It may sound strange, but I never have felt something like this before. I feel happy, free but especially I feel myself when I'm with you. I don't know what it is but you bring out the best in me. You can make me smile, even when I'm sad. I'm really happy that I met you, it felt like a gift. 

It feels like I've finally found someone who really understands me, who can make me really happy. I want to thank you Harry, for who you are. I want to thank you for making my life a little better.

Unfortunately, as I say goodbye to you, you probably understand yourself that we can not be together. I regret what happened last night, you deserve someone else Harry.

Someone who is better for you. Someone who makes you also happy and give you all her love. Someone who's easier to love. It is better if we do not see each other anymore, I'm sorry ..

Love, Kristen. "