Misted Thoughts

In Another Time

I never knew
When poetry hit me
It doesn't do a subtle job at hiding my dependency on
Papers and ink blots that connect like dots of stars in the night sky

Poetry is a ghost that converts my inner soul
Into the tapestry that hang from your grandmother's walls
Into the dancer's stage and the singer's lyric
I am only a servant to the thoughts that occur in my head at odd times of the month
And during those sickly moments I am frustrated to not have a vent
A release for this mass creativity that rises from the pit of my stomach and reaches my head
Almost like the ocean I sprang into with full conscience
Of the icy water hitting my nerves like a pair of boxers in the ring.

I never knew I would meet you like this
After years of yearning to see you
And days of being forgotten
I never knew I would wear that same blue dress
And you'd pick up a flower behind your ear.

I never knew it would be at a train stop than a night club
I never knew I would take you home
And instead of mingling our bodies in the heat of the moment
I would tell you stories of how my
Grandfather gave up his life not for his land like he wished to
But to his animosity, to the cravings of his mind
Stories of you and us. Stories of the us after nothing was really left to tell.

I never knew you would tell me more about your businesses than your guitar
It is funny how you ran after money when
All your thoughts cycled the opposite direction
I am confused how you let your sister wed
When you thought of love as a poison.

I showed you the same photographs that brought those same tears in your eyes.

But you didn't stay for dinner.

It was that one day in that one year that never let me sleep in peace.
I kept waiting, the door was always open.
The flowers wilted from summer to autumn
And the dress became shorter with wear.

But you, darling you, didn't stay for dinner.

And frankly
Now I'm just happy eating alone.
I'm happy with me
Alone
But never lonely. Never ever lonely