Just Keep Walking

Eighty seven

"Okay. This is Esther," Negan explained, walking into the kitchen, "and she's gonna look after you. Me and Carl will be back soon."
Before Mary could say anything, Negan was gone, and a motherly looking woman in her mid fifties was smiling at her. "Hey honey. You gonna help me do some baking?" She smiled gently, and Mary blinked up at her, nervous and shy, not wanting to talk.
"Ah, you're a quiet one. Come on, it's alright. I'm not gonna hurt you."
Mary reached out and took her hand, then walked over to a large worktop. Esther picked her up effortlessly, and sat her on it, then passed her a cookie cutter.
"Come on then, we've not got all day, and I need your help." She smiled, and Mary gave her a tiny smile back, looking into her deep brown eyes. She cut out some cookie dough into star shapes, the action repetitive and somehow soothing.
"Where's your mommy, Mary?" Esther asked after ten minutes, once she'd slid the raw stars into the oven.
"She's dead." Mary breathed, playing with her mess of tangled hair.
"I'm sorry about that." Esther whispered, putting a hand on Mary's shoulder.
"Everyone dies. It's sad but it's life."
"Yeah." Esther nodded slowly.
"Are you a mommy?"
"I was."
"You still are." Mary pointed out, and Esther nodded.
"Yeah, I am."
"Did they die?"
"Yeah. She did."
"That's sad. I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry about your mommy."
"Thanks. I have sort of another mommy now. My daddy's in love with Mishy, and she's like a mommy."
"Do you like her?" Esther asked gently, rummaging through the cupboards.
"I love her. She's my favourite girl. My favourite person is daddy, but now I'm not sure, because Negan says he's a bad man. I'm confused. Then it's Carl and Glenn, joint together because I love them the same, then my Uncle Daryl. He's here too."
"Yeah, I've seen him." Esther nodded gently.
"But Mishy's my favourite girl, then Maggie, then Judith. Judith's my baby sister, but she's not my favouritest because she's boring. She just sleeps and cries and eats and sometimes plays. But I still love her." Mary explained, opening up; she hadn't even told Negan about Judith yet.
"That's good."
"Yeah. I also have an Aunt Carol, but she moved away. And I love Rosita. She's a really cool badass, and she's only nice to me, because I'm a badass like her. I've killed people."
Esther stopped then, but didn't comment - she told herself that the poor child would have had to. "Here, darling. Get some fat on you, you're ever so skinny."
"I don't eat when I'm sad." Mary shrugged.
"Well, I think you can eat this." Esther prompted, waving some chocolate chips at her. Mary gave her a tiny nod, and ate a few.
"I want to go home." Mary whispered, nuzzling into her bunny.
"I'm sure you will soon. Negan won't be long."
Mary closed her eyes, and inhailed Carl Bunny's scent; it was home. It smelt of the fresh washing powder that Rick used in their clothes, and of baked beans, of sweat, of coffee, of strawberry shampoo, of Rick's cologne he'd began to use (ever since they were in Alexandria and he'd started seeing Michonne). It was home.
Mary and Esther made small talk for almost an hour until Negan came back to retrieve her.
"C'mon get your shit. We're goin'." Negan barked.
"It's in my pockets." Mary whispered shakily.
"Okay. Move it." He shrugged.
"My hip hurts." She whimpered, truthful and shaky. She'd gone from not moving almost all day every day for the past week, to doing a lot of walking in a few hours. It was a shock to her weak, broken joint.
"Carl said you'd been shot there a while back. It really hurts?" Negan sighed, his voice sincere.
"Yeah. I just want Glenny. He makes me feel better. He makes it better."
Negan couldn't listen anymore, so he sighed, then picked her up, carrying her on his hip.
"Let's get you some medicine."
"Can she have one of these?" Esther asked softly, holding out a warm, star shaped cookie. Negan nodded, and Mary took the cookie.
"Thank you. Bye bye."
"See you later, sunshine." Esther smiled, and Negan and Mary left. Mary began to cry then; Rick called her Sunshine.
Negan walked straight to the infirmary, fighting she was in pain. "Hey. Carson. She needs some pain shit." Negan barked.
The doctor nodded, and found some tablets. "Will you take these?" He asked Mary softly, and she nodded.
"When I was littler, I got shot. It got infected and I nearly died. I had to take a lotta pills." Mary explained, swallowing a tablet without water.
"Impressive." Negan remarked.
"At Hilltop there's a Doctor Carson. Can you see my scar?"
"I can." Carson laughed softly, Mary's facial scar her defining feature; it was long and deep and ugly.
"He stitched it up. He's nice. He gave me candy. Do you know him?"
"He's my brother." The man nodded sadly.
"Really?"
"Bye." Negan snapped, picking Mary up and leaving. They walked outside to a van, and Mary let out a sigh of relief when she saw Carl sat there, next to a driver.
"Moo? You okay?" Carl asked gently. She nodded, and Negan dropped her onto Carl's lap.
"Sit there." He said simply, then he sat on his own seat, and shut the door. He let out a crafty smile, then rolled down his window and leaned out of it.
"Daryl!" Negan shouted, and Daryl walked over. "You seem worried, so I'm taking the kids home." Negan explained.
"If you do anything to them..." Daryl threatened, but Negan cut him off. "Dwight! Daryl needs a time out, put him back in his box for a while!" The man shouted, and Dwight walked over, grabbing Daryl and dragging him away, Negan's middle finger raised.
Mary looked at him, then raised her own middle finger at Negan, silent and defiant. Carl laughed, but before Negan could see, he enclosed her hand inside his first, a gentle, loving gesture. Mary span to face him, and kissed his cheek, then nuzzled into his chest.
"I love you." Mary whispered, holding a fistful of his shirt, and her bunny to his face.
"I love you more. Go to sleep. Have a nap. It's gonna be a long day." Carl soothed, but Mary was asleep in his arms before he could finish his sentence. She finally felt safe.