Just Keep Walking

One hundred and twenty one

That night almost everyone slept in the house, or on the grass on the grounds, the tents and portacabins still damaged from the battle the night before. Mary couldn't sleep, and was laid in between Michonne and Rick, her eyes staring at the ceiling. Slowly, she turned to Rick, and poked his shoulder.
"I can't sleep." She whispered to him, then poked him yet again. "Daddy. I can't sleep!" She whined, causing Rick's eyes to snap open.
"Hmm? What's, what's wrong? What's wrong, baby?" Rick asked groggily.
"I can't sleep. I miss Carl too much." Mary mumbled.
"I know. I know. Me too." Rick whispered, pulling Mary into his chest.
"It's not just is three anymore. It's not me and you and Carl. We were a team. And Mishy and Judith got to be part of our team. And that was maybe okay. But not not Carl. I want Carl."
"Me too. Me too, my little love."
"I wish it had been me," Mary whispered, looking into Rick's eyes, "I wish I'd died, and not Carl. And then everyone might not be as sad, because you knew Carl for longer than you knew me. So you wouldn't miss me as much. And no one would be as sad. I wish it had been me, daddy. Then I wouldn't be sad about Glenn and I'd be with him and mommy and Carl could stay and look after everyone better than I do."
Mary's tiny words shattered Rick's heart, and he didn't know how to reply for a second. He didn't know how to reply to that. Instead, he sat up, and held Mary even tighter, tears falling into her hair.
"Mary. If you died, I'd be just as heartbroken. I couldn't ever lose you. Okay? So don't ever say that. I love you and need you all equally. If I ever lost you, I'd miss you just as much. Don't ever think anything different. I love you, so so so much. Never think anything else."
"I miss him. And Glenn. I miss Glenn so much. And I want Carl!"
"I know you do. I know. I... I want him too. You know what I think though?"
"What?" Mary whimpered, looking up to see Rick crying freely.
"I think... I think Carl is with mommy. And with Glenn. And all of our other friends that died. But especially mommy, okay? She's looking after him."
"I like that." Mary whispered, crying as much as Rick was. "Mommy is looking after Carl now. And Andre. I think Michonne would like that."
"Yeah," Rick nodded softly, "mommy's looking after Carl and Andre."
"Daddy?" A tiny voice whined, before crying, and Rick sighed.
"Number three's up." He sighed, sitting up and getting Judith out of the crib she was sharing with Gracie.
"Everything okay?" Michonne mumbled, turning over and waking up.
"And now everyone's up." Rick sighed, walking around the room with Judith, trying to soothe her back to sleep, and earned a reply of Gracie shrieking from the cot, but before Michonne could get up to tend to the other child, they heard the sound of someone falling down the stairs.
"What the hell is going on?" Michonne muttered, still half asleep, "Woke up and everyone's awake."
"No, someone just fell down the stairs." Rick said, putting Judith down on the bed, making her scream. But that wasn't the only scream; someone from downstairs was now howling. Rick jogged down the stairs, followed by Mary, to see Walkers in the house; Walkers, all over the ground floor of the house.
"Upstairs. Upstairs!" Rick hissed to Mary, before going to kill the Walkers, and save as many people as he could. Mary scrambled up the stairs, and her panicked eyes were all the information Michonne needed. She knew what was happening, and grabbed her katana, then looked at Mary.
"Stay here. Lock the door. Look after the girls." She whispered, before running down the stairs, slamming the door behind her. Mary scowled, looking at the two crying girls.
"Judy," Mary hissed, deciding the toddler was the most rational, "no crying. Shush. You're not a baby. Gracie's a baby. Not you. Shush." Judith, surprisingly, stopped crying, and looked at her older sister with wide eyes. "Judy, there's Walkers down stairs. What happens when Walkers see us?"
"Bye." The two year old whimpered.
"Yeah. They bite and you go bye bye. So shush." Mary hissed, and Judith nodded, her blue eyes filled with tears.
"Mary? Open up! It's me! It's Claire! Claire and Sam and Faye and Gage and Rodney! Okay, open up, your mommy said you was in here."
Mary ran to the door and opened it, letting Claire and her husband and son in, and another woman and her son.
"Can you make them not cry?" Mary asked, suddenly tearful, and already Gracie was being soothed in Faye's arms. Mary nodded, then grabbed a rather long knife from the side, and ran downstairs. She killed two Walkers before anyone realised she was there, and another two  before all of the Walkers were dead.
In the aftermath, she stood with Rick, Daryl, and Morgan, dazed.
"Where's..." Mary began, and Rick sighed.
"Mom's outside. It's fine. You was supposed to stay upstairs." Rick said, annoyance in his voice.
"The hell happened?" Daryl snapped, ignoring Mary and Rick's little dispute.
"I dunno. Maybe Walkers got in. Maybe during the fight?"
"These are all our own people though."
"That's Heather's daddy." Mary whispered, looking at one of the men she put down.
"It doesn't make sense." Morgan added, but was cut off by the sound of a struggle upstairs, making Rick's blood run cold; Judith was upstairs. Luckily, it wasn't their room, but Carol's, and they arrived just as she killed the Walker. Tobin. Mary looked at him, and remembered the time he gave her a shoulder ride, back at Alexandria. Her eyes began to water, but she blinked them away, and looked at Carol.
"He wasn't bit. But he turned." Carol sighed, and Rick paced a few steps, rolling ideas around in his head.
"Negan's bat," he nodded slowly, "when I was out there with him, it was covered in Walker blood. I just thought he'd crossed some. But maybe..."
"They have us working for them again. Killin' our own." Maggie whispered, turning to a man laid sick in bed, a bandage on his arm, covering a wound from the battle the night before.
"It's the fever. That's what it is. It makes sense now. One of you... You're gonna have to do it. I can't. You gotta do it for me. Please. Please." He sniffled, and Mary nodded, walking towards him.
"It'll be okay," she whispered, "my mommy will look after you in Heaven."
"Mary..." Rick began, and Mary looked at him with sad eyes.
"He's gonna turn. I can do it."
"No. Go... Go check in on Tara." Daryl said quickly, wanting to avoid Mary putting him to sleep. Then the thought hit Mary's mind, the same one that Daryl had held for the past few moments. She remembered bandaging Tara's wound. Tara might die.
They all left, going to the room where Tara slept, all apart from Daryl, who stayed by the sick man's bedside. And when Mary was gone, and he'd received a reassuring nod, he put the man to rest.