tom holland imagines

why won't you love me - 1

Tom fumbled with his phone, letting out a sigh as he clicked the button for airplane mode. Of course, leave it up to Tom to make things awkward as he was leaving for filming. He leaned in towards the window of the plane, pressing his warm cheek against the cool glass of the window. His hand rubbed over his face as he remembered one of the last things he'd said to you before he left. "Just... promise me you'll be careful, be good, stay safe until I get back."

Of course you couldn't help but nod, telling him that you would be fine. Things were kind of weird between the two of you now, but Tom was still your best friend and it meant a lot that he cared. And, honestly, you were going to miss him a lot while he was gone.

The plane took off, and Tom watched as everything on the ground got smaller and smaller, before disappearing beneath the clouds. His chest heaved as he took a deep breath, trying to avoid crying. Even though he had just turned airplane mode on, Tom checked his phone, looking at the picture of you and him on his home screen. In the picture, your arms were around his waist as he hugged you into his side. Huge grins split both of your faces as you looked at each other, rather than the camera. The picture had been taken when Tom came home from filming the first Spider-Man movie. It always reminded him that he would never be lonely; he always had you to talk to, to come back to. He hoped that was still the case.

You leaned into Tom, a blanket placed across your laps as the two of you stared at the TV. You were watching Tom's favorite movie, as he was going to be leaving, and you wanted to be with him. Your head rested against his shoulder as his arm wrapped around you, pulling you in closer.

There was only one thought on your mind as the movie was coming to an end. "Tom?" your voice was soft as you lifted your eyes up to look at him.

It took a moment before he tore his eyes away from the screen to look at you. He tilted his head as he looked at you, "What's up, Y/N/N?"

Your teeth bit into your bottom lip as you let out a small sigh, already feeling guilty because of what you were going to say, "I don't want you to leave. I'm going to be lonely and I'm going to miss you like hell."

Tom's eyes softened, his hand running up and down your arm slowly. "I know, I'm going to miss you, too. So much. I wish I didn't have to go."

You knew he had to leave, and you were so incredibly proud of him for living his dream, but it was hard to watch him leave. It seemed like time was flying by - your best friend from high school was engaged, you had other friends who were married and had children - but you were stuck, just watching Tom come and go.

Tom had been your best friend since you were little. You had feelings for him, but you would never admit that. You knew something had to change in your life, but you just didn't know how to make that happen.

Without saying anything else, you put your head back on Tom's shoulder. His hand came up, playing with the ends of your hair, twirling it around his fingers.

Suddenly, Tom sat up and paused the movie, twisting his torso to face you. "Y/N, I need to tell you something." You sat up, tucking your legs beneath you as you turned toward him, your eyebrows drawing together in confusion.

He took a deep breath, running his tongue over his bottom lip. "Y/N, I'm leaving soon and I just need you to know... I love you."

You gave him a smile and nodded your head, "I love you t-"

Tom shook his head quickly, cutting you off. "No, Y/N, I love you. I've had feelings for you for a while, and I know this could ruin things, but I just- I just need you to know that."

Your heart started pounding in your chest, and your eyes went wide. "W-what?" Your mind was racing faster than your heart was beating as you tried to comprehend what was happening.

"I know this is bad timing. And I understand if you don't feel the same way, it's okay, but I love you. The thought of being away from you is killing me, and at the very least, I just- I wish you were mine." Tom's face was flushed and he stuttered as he tried to get everything out that he needed to say.

Immediately, everything inside of you was screaming, "Yes! Yes! Yes!" But, for some reason, the words that came out of your mouth were, "Tom, you're my best friend... And you're leaving in two days."

Tom's face fell a little bit, but he kept his gaze on you. His voice was soft and he spoke hesitantly, "Babe, you keep saying that things need to change for you and that you're lonely. I've seen you cry over this. I can't fix everything, but I can try. I want to be with you. I know you can feel that there's something more between us."

You tore your eyes from Tom, your fingers playing with the knitted blanket that was laying in your lap. "Tom, I can't do this right now. Not as you're leaving for a few months. You don't know how long I've wanted this. But this- this isn't a good time."

You could hear the sigh that fell from his lips, his fingers inching over to yours slowly. "I know. I know it's not a good time. But it's us. We can make it work."

Keeping your gaze focused down on your hands, you shook your head a little. "Tom..."

You dared a glance up to Tom, and the look on his face broke your heart, "Why won't you love me, Y/N?"

The second the plane landed, Tom pulled out his phone and quickly dialed your number. It was 2 am back home, and he didn't know if you'd be awake, but it was worth a try.

You were, in fact, awake. Sitting at a table in the pub that you and Tom always went to together. You'd had a few drinks when Tom's name showed up on the screen. You wanted so badly to answer, but knew that you shouldn't now, not when you were tipsy and missing Tom more than anything. You flipped your phone face down onto the table and got one more drink before heading home.

As you got into bed for the night, you wished so desperately that Tom was down the hall in his room. If he had been, you would've been in his bed, cuddled up next to him within seconds. But instead, you were lonely tonight. Why had you turned him down? Why couldn't you love him, even when you wanted to?

Tom gave up after two more calls and no answer. He sent a quick text, "hope you're okay, text when you can." He sighed as he got into bed, wishing that you could be next to him. He knew you loved him as more than just friends, but didn't understand why you couldn't admit it.

The next morning you replied to Tom's text, "sorry, I didn't hear my phone go off. I'm late to work, I'll text u later."

-

A few weeks later, Tom was in his trailer, on a break from filming. The two of you had only talked a little, and it was mostly just a quick check in to see if the other was doing okay. Tom was in the middle of changing when there was a knock at the door. As he was wearing only his boxers, he called out, "One second!"

The knocking only got more frantic, so Tom went to open the door. Standing there in only his underwear, Tom's jaw dropped and his eyes widened at what was standing in front of him. "Y/N? What- what are you doing here?"