Star Gaze

Breaking Down

Hey! That was a big cliffhanger... No worries! All will be explained in this chapter. This chapter is a biggy btw. Further more...
Enjoy:)
-Les❤️

SHE LOOKED AT me with confused eyes. It looked like all the blood drained out of her.

"Wait, what? Are you like some super fan who managed to learn everything about me?" She laughed nervously.

"Look." I took out the picture. "That's you holding little me when I was born. Franksin Hospital."

She took the picture out of my hand and I could see the spark of remembrance in her eyes. She looked closer at the picture.

"Samantha?" She smiled, not taking her eyes off it.

"It's Scarlett, actually."

She gave me back the picture and got into thought. "So you tracked me down and catfished me at the same time?" My face turned red at her bland statement. "Neat."

I looked at her in confusion and she lightly laughed. "I understand. But, at least now you met me." I gave her a hug and she returned it.

We leaned against the wall and started talking there. "Your going to love home. It's not too big, not too small-"

"Who said I was coming home?"

"I...thought- why?"

"Star, I have a job across the country. I model for a living." She shook her head. "I can't just quit everything for you?"

"But, don't you want to make up all the years we spent separated? All those times we could've spent together but never did. I thought you would want to spend some time with me...your daughter?"

She didn't speak. She only swallowed really hard and managed to say two words. "I can't."

I didn't want my own mother to think I wasn't strong, so I held in all the sadness and hurt. "So you aren't coming home?"

"No. I'm staying in L.A."

"Then, can you at least answer one question for me?" My eyes were glued to the ground, unable to look her in the eyes.

"Anything, Star." She looked at me and nodded. Since she was a model, I couldn't tell if she was faking it or not.

"Why did you leave?" I managed to look her straight in the eyes, awaiting for the answer that I have waited years for.

It took her a few seconds before she spoke, as if she was making up a reason. "You know that I love modeling, right?"

I nodded my head.

"I wanted to continue my career, with you. In L.A. Two beautiful girls walking in downtown Los Angeles. I had it all planned out. Then when you were born, I looked at you. I had blue eyes, golden blonde hair and a shining smile. You had brown eyes, dirty blonde hair and a smile of sadness. I love modeling but, I don't think you would be up for it."

"You love modeling more than your own daughter? You left me because of my appereance? Because I'm not perfect, like you? Because I wasn't beautiful enough! Because I wasn't born as pretty as you!-"

"That's not what I meant-"

"That's exactly what you meant. That's why...dad never wanted me to know."

"My modeling career was skyrocketing! You expected me to leave that fame to be a 'stay at home mom'?"

"You could have still taken me! You could have brought me with you! I didn't have to be a model!"

She sighed deeply. "Star, I'm sor-"

"It's Scarlett. Get it right." And with that I ran off. Tears running down my ugly face.

The face my own mother had rejected.
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Ashton was still knocking on the public bathroom door.

"Scar, please? Come out...we can get through this together." I could feel him slam his head against the door. "I love you."

This made me cry harder. I don't even know why, I just wanted to drown myself in his presence but something was stopping me.

Insecurity.

I opened the door and Ashton hugged me immediately. He held me tight. I stepped back and he put his hand on my face. I took it away and looked at the floor.

The Uber outside of the airport honked and we went outside.

Franksin Airport.

The one place I would never want to remember but somehow could never forget.
__________________________________________________________________________________

I sat in my bed staring at the one picture I had of mom. Well, of that girl.

Anger and the flashback came to me. I rose in an instant and took out a lighter from one of my drawers.

I stared at my mom's face while I burned it. Weirdly, relief came to me. I stared at the fire on the picture, and saw her face fade away.

More anger came out of me and I decided to burn something else. I clicked the lighter on and held out my finger. The lighter was centimeters away from me.

"Scar, lunch is rea-" Ashton's face turned pale at the scene: Me in the corner of the room with a burning picture, a lighter and my finger next to it.

He hurried to me and took the lighter out of my hands. It was for the better.

"Would you please tell me what happened?" He stared at me vulnerably.

This was going to be a long day.
*

How would you have reacted if your mother did that to you?

Please VOTE, COMMENT and FOLLOW!
-Les❤️