Poems About Life

Glass wall

Some days I feel like there's a glass wall in front of me, no matter which way I turn

I see everyone on the other side but wonder why I can't reach them, why I'm alone behind the glass

I see sticks and stones littered at the foot of my wall, it is protection or a cell?

I can barely see through it in some places because of all the cracks and chips.

Some days I want to tear the glass wall down and grind it down to the sand it once was

I want to take a hammer to that wall and scream as it falls

cry as the shards cut my skin and the stones break my bones and bruise my body

I want to lay down behind the wall and pretend it doesn't exist

Some days I want to see if I can catch their attention, see if someone else can see me

I want to scream and yell until they realize I'm there

I want to fight someone and force them to feel what its like to have a glass wall in front of their face

make someone else carry it for a while, find out what it's like to see clearly

I remember building it, hardening those lies and those hurt feelings into something I could hide behind

I wish I could have let those sands pass between us, was it my fault or yours they stayed?

I wish I could find a better way to let you in. I wish I could find a way to bring it down and be better than I was

I wish that it didn't hurt like this, I wish that the wall wasn't my heart, I wish I could feel and understand.

I wonder if others have their walls too

I wonder if they're trying too, desperately, to bring it down

or if they're content to be apart, to be a watcher, to be alone and safe

I wonder what will happen when my wall comes down and they feel the shards of glass on their skin and feel my pain and finally see me

see me broken and bloody and angry and scared of myself and the world