Settling in Seattle

Chapter 39- Heartache

-TRIGGER WARNING- This chapter contains mentions of blood and is based around loss, please don't read if this is triggering to you-

******

Within seconds there was blood everywhere. Rachel crumpled over and held her stomach, it was cramping, cramping like it never had before. Rachel switched the shower off by reaching for the dial incoherently. She could hear Mike running up the stairs and burst into tears. She broke down, leaning her back on the cold tile, she held her head in her hands and sobbed.

"Rachel? Babe... What's..." Mike stopped as he burst into the bathroom, his eyes widened at the sight of his wife, desperate in the shower. There was blood all over the floor, and she was leaning herself against the wall to be steady. She looked up, her eyes already reddened, scratches on her face and saw Mike, not saying anything. He turned away for a moment, searching for something to wrap her in. He found her towel that had been neatly placed on the rack and opened it up. Suddenly Mike didn't care about himself, and he stepped into the shower, taking the towel and gently wrapping Rachel in it. He didn't say anything for a moment, just embraced her into a hug. He folded his arms around her shoulders and fitted her head underneath his chin. She was still sobbing, but Mike knew what she was thinking. She was going to blame herself, and that's not what they needed right now.

"Mike." She mustered words through hysterics, looking up into his big, blue eyes.

"Rachel listen to me," Mike held her arms, so she was steady, "It's going to be okay. Rachel it will. I know you don't want to hear this, but we need to get you to the hospital." Rachel's heart skipped a beat as Mike spoke the last word and she stared up at him with another look of great despair. She still didn't say anything, just stood and clung back onto Mike, who was now also upset, but standing strong for Rachel.

"I... I..." She burst into another fit of tears and tried to bring her hands to her face, to either hide it, or scratch it in frustration. Mike held them back, and gently rubbed the bare arms carefully, trying his best to hold it together.

"Rachel you sit here," He gestured to stay in the bathroom, "and I'll call the doctor, tell him what's happened. Rachel it's going to be okay." Mike repeated, whilst helping his wife to sit onto the floor. He grabbed her phone from the bedside cabinet and began to ring the doctor. His voice sounded panicked, extremely panicked. Once the phone call was over, he walked back into the bathroom, to see Rachel sobbing still, pointing to the shower floor, to which Mike peered, his heart dropped. It was indescribable.

"How are you doing?" Mike walked into the bedroom, where Rachel was propped up in bed, her eyes swollen, she was just sat staring into space. She just shook her head in response, and her eyes began to fill again, making her even more frustrated, "Hey, baby, it's okay. It's okay to cry. I love you." Mike came to Rachel and sat on the edge of the bed. He kissed her forehead gently, before pulling her in for another hug. The doctor had assessed her and broken the news that they'd had a miscarriage. He had reluctantly informed them that the embryo had in fact stopped developing at four weeks.

"Mike, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I know you were so excited for this baby." She spoke sniffling.

"No... No Rachel, this isn't your fault, it's just life. And this is sometimes what happens." Mike kissed her head again, before she looked up with a sudden urge of concern.

"Is Hayley alright?" Rachel's eyes drooped as she looked at the clock beside her bed, that read 01:33.

"Yes, she's fine, I told her to go back home when we got back in, Rosalie was asleep the whole time."

"Okay, good." Rachel rasped and patted Mike's side of the bed for him to sit there. When he'd climbed over, she leant on his shoulder and began to cry again but grabbed hold of his hand which was on her thigh. She clenched it within an inch of a life, moving her fingers over his.

"It'll be alright you know. You'll get through this. How about you try and sleep, then at least..."

Mike was cut off, but he didn't care, at least she was talking, letting it out, "Why did it have to be us? Why did it have to happen?"

"Rachel, everything happens for a reason love. I promise today is the shock of it. You can take as long as you need to process. Love it's really late, or early, you ought to get some sleep."

"How am I going to see Rosalie, my poor baby." She persisted.

"Don't think about that, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it." Rachel held his hand tighter.

"I can't."

"Yes, you can. Listen, I'll sit here, and you can go to sleep, you're safe, you just need some sleep." Mike began rubbing his thumb over her hand, before she sunk lower into the bed. Rachel shifted uncomfortably, to be closer to Mike, where he moved so she was cuddled into him. He kissed the top of her head and then started to play with her hair. Her eyes slowly drifted shut, and as soon as Rachel was certainly asleep, Mike let a tear slip down his cheek. He didn't want her to see him like that. He wanted to be strong for her. He soon after fell into a deep sleep, to be woken three hours later by Rachel.

She was sobbing uncontrollably; however, she was restraining, trying not to wake up Mike or Rosalie. Mike sat straight up and came to her aid, hugging and kissing her, convincing her that everything was going to be okay. She finally managed to explain her dream, and it broke Mike's heart.

"Rachel it's not real, it's not. You're safe, you may not be okay now, but you will be. I need you to trust me love, I need you too. It will get better."

"Come here." Mike left the idea of her sleeping out of her brain, and just snuggled into Rachel, doing the best he could to make her feel a little bit better. She was still sniffling, it was an impossible job, so they ended up in silence, embracing each other for what should've been eternity.