Their Choices, Their Life

Chapter Nineteen.

I laid on Michael's chest the next morning feeling a lot of things. I was feeling grateful that I was finally with the man I loved. Ecstatic even, which isn't an emotion I can ever remember feeling my whole life. I've never felt the way I feel right now. I also felt a little guilty, still. I mean it was just last night that I broke things off with Andre. The sad look on his face when he closed my car door seemed to be etched in my brain for the moment. But I'm here with Michael.

Focus on Michael, I told myself over and over.

I pushed my head deeper into him to listen to his heartbeat. I think sometimes we forget that there's this powerful thing in our center working all the time to keep us alive, pumping blood through our bodies nonstop. It's a miracle. I laid there still and listened for a while before my desire for him took over. I was so in love with this man that just listening to him live and breathe turned me on. I ran my fingers across his chest, then slowly made a trail down his abs and into his briefs. My ears, still listening to his heart, heard and felt it's rhythm pick up as my hand tried it's best to wake him up.

"Babe," he laughed. "Are we going to get any sleep the next four months?"

"I hope not," I said still massaging his dick and lifting my head to flick his nipple with my tongue.

"You so nasty, girl. I need you to keep this same freak energy after BJ gets here. The way you feel right now is how I always feel about you. I want you all the time Jay." The sincerity in his voice had me feeling hot and tingly.

"You can have all the time. Whenever, wherever."

"Aight, don't write a check your pussy can't cash," he warned.

"I ain't scared!" Something told me he was going to use my words against sometime in the near future. He kissed me and rolled over to check his phone for the time. "Hey, we're not done yet!"

"No time, we gotta get going."

"Get going to what? I ain't got no job so I have nowhere to be on this fine Thursday morning," I huffed.

"Yes you do. Guess what?" Michael was grinning at me a little too hard for my liking. I ignored his giddiness and looked at him annoyed. The more he talked, the less likely it seemed I was going to get a nut this morning. He continued after he realized I wasn't up for playing a guessing game.

"I signed us up for Lamaze classes. The first one is this morning and I don't want to be late."

"You did? That's so sweet! I was actually thinking about taking some classes. I'm a little nervous about giving birth. What if I can't handle the pain? Or the baby isn't in the right position to come out when it's time? Or I may start bleeding too much. I was reading the other day that Black women are more likely to die from complications of child birth than any other race. I have to be here for BJ."

"And you will." Michael pulled me back to his chest while tears ran down my face and on to him. "We have the best doctor and she and I are going to make sure you're good. You don't need to stress yourself out about any of that."

"But, the article said that even if the patient has access to great medical care it only decreases the likelihood--"

"But nothing, Jay. I only want to hear you speak good things into the atmosphere. It's normal to be concerned, you've never done this before, but you need to stay positive. I need you too much for you to be even talking like that."

"You're right, but the closer we get, the more nervous I get."

"Babe," his fingertips swept up and down my back, trying his best to soothe me. "You'll be fine. Better than fine, I promise."