Lithium (Once Upon a Time)

Chapter Seventeen: Christmas Carol

Storybrooke, 20th December 2012...

Emma: "Emma, can you please hand Leroy the golden balls to attach to the tree?" Mary Margaret asked, while my mind was off the decorations that engulfed Granny's in a tedious glow of Christmas spirit. I never liked that day, I always despised it, as if I were Scrooge only blonde and young.

"Emma!" Mary Margaret called me to earth, but my mind was further than the enchanted forest.

"Yeah!" I said, with my mouth opened. One of this days I have to close my mouth when I get surprised...

David came closer to me and placed his hand on my head, while kissing my forehead.

"Your mother loves Christmas, back in our land, she would have our entire castle encircled my glowing trees!" He confessed, but I really didn't care...

I just couldn't feel the importance of Christmas, it only reminded me of the pain of being alone in the foster system and having all the other kids celebrating with their family. I remember Margot, the girl who lived next door, close to the home group, but with a family of her own, that would give her the most wonderful presents and gifts, and they'd eat so many treats, never complaining about stomachaches, after that.

I shook my head, promising I wouldn't cry, and built my walls around me. I grabbed the golden balls and placed them on the tree, Henry came after me, shortly after it.

"Hey, Emma, come see the lightnings outside Granny's!" He asked, grabbing my hand and jumping hysterically. He was so cute and little.

But as he made his request, I realized how strange it was for him to call me "Emma" instead of "mom". The two of us were so close, closer than him and Regina, but he'd always call her "mom" and he'd always call me "Emma", even after Regina's imprisonment.

Sometimes I missed her...Madam mayor. Sometimes I thought that we were too cruel to her. Sometimes I imagined the pain of the "treatment" she was receiving. Mary Margaret thought it was her chance to be "good" once again, if the doctors could burn her Evil Queen memories away. But it was wrong, I couldn't stop feeling how wrong it was...

As for Henry, I thought he still missed her, even though he seemed cold whenever I'd talk to him about her, which wasn't very often, despite it.

But with Christmas approaching, I couldn't help but think the pain Regina was feeling. How bad would it be to spend that day alone, worse...in an asylum?! I just couldn't help but feel sorry for her, even after everything she did.

"Henry..." I approached my raven-haired son, placing my hand on his shoulder. "I was thinking...Wouldn't it be nice...If we visited Regina, tomorrow?"

"What? But she's the Evil Queen..." Ouch, even the way he spoke about her hurt me, and I wasn't Regina's child.

"Are you sure about that? I mean, she's still your mother. Don't you like Regina anymore?"

"After everything she did...Do you?"

"Well...I just...I don't think we should just...I don't know, maybe we could just spare her for this day. No one deserves to spend Christmas alone...Not even the Evil Queen." I was shocked to be the one to defend Regina after everything we'd been trough.

"I guess you're right...Sometimes I think about her...Sometimes I even think that it's my fault that she went there. If I didn't bring you to Storybrooke, she'd be free...But then again, everyone else would be cursed...And that's worse."

"But what do you think? Should we visit her?"

"I don't know, maybe...But the doctors said that she's still not showing progress."

"I know...But if you want my opinion, I don't think this therapy will help her. I mean, she's suffering in there."

"What?" Henry was surprised, me, Mary Margaret and David decided not to talk with Henry about Regina's treatment's conditions.

"I'm sorry, kid...But the truth is that Regina may be in pain under the treatment. Maybe the best way to get to her is by forgiveness, maybe that way she can find the light in her heart."

"You think we should forgive my mom?"

"Well..." I didn't want to admit it, or even think about it. Regina and I were still nemesis. After everything she did to separate me from Henry, I couldn't think about forgiving her, let alone after finding out she was the reason for my parents to send me away. But still, it was as if I understood her. We were so different, yet...So alike. We'd both been hurt by the ones we loved, the only difference was that I never fell to the dark side. But what if I did? What if I lived in a land where darkness takes the seductive face of magic...Would I turn dark? That was the reason why I clang to the idea that maybe, just maybe...Regina earned forgiveness.

"I tell you what, Henry. Let's go to Regina's, let's talk to her. Let's get to her and hope that she can change, because, honestly, no one deserves to be alone on Christmas Eve."

"Okay, Emma. I'll do it, but you have to promise me something. We need to free my mom. I didn't know she was in pain, I thought she was just with the doctors, that they were helping her get better. If I knew she were in pain, I'd tell you to free her. Please, Emma, she's still my mom, can you save her?"

As my raven-haired boy's forest eyes widened in expectation, my jaw hit the floor. It was one thing to give Regina the benefit of the doubt, but another was letting her back into the world. Could things go terribly worse now that she was hurt for spending a full year in that awful asylum? She'd probably have all our hearts for leaving her alone, so would freeing her help us as much as it did her? And what about Henry? I didn't want to disappoint him, I wanted him to see me as the savior, but would I be brave enough to save my truest frenemy?