My Innocent Love

Preface

Preface

When I was twelve, I never thought how grieving my losses would feel. At twenty-five, the grief has overpowered me in its circle and I don't know where to look for release apart from hoping to return to the woman I love so much that I was willing to sacrifice my entire existence for her and I did.

But somewhere along the lines, I'm done being this super-strong man. I want my life back.

It has been two years and ten months since I've seen the dawn and today as I stand watching it, I only recall what my Raisha told me always.

She said, and I quote: The dawn wouldn't be beautiful if the dusk didn't appear.

My dusk happened years back but now I want my dawn back. It's with Her not away from Her.

And suddenly, tears spill from my eyes and I drop on my knees not able to hold this misery any longer. It's intense!

I cover my face with my palms and allow my tears to flow as long as they wanted.

Small whimpers turn into loud hiccups but before I could emerge mourning for the lost time, I grab my notebook and caress her handwriting for the millionth time.

It filled me with warmth. I remembered my reason to make the hardest decision of our lives. I made her Raisha Aayush Khandelwal, but I deprived her our togetherness.

But it won't last long.

I grab the pen she gifted me, and in the notebook, I cherished the most, I wrote: "It wasn't the red that turned black in our lives. It was the black that turned red because she was my Angel in Red."