siblings.

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is everything okay?
your breathing is strange

I guess
it must have sound like laughing

do you want to have breakfast?
you're still tired, aren't you?

he was the oldest brother
they both were the older brothers
oh,
why do I always have to get
all of these flashbacks?

take a sip of your coffee
you're silent this morning,
you know that?

I know
how to be strong
I'm a strong little girl,
but
I can't breathe
under this blanket

okay, I'll go for a shower
but you need to tell me what's up

stop it
stop it
I
can't
breathe
it's hot
it's way too hot

what did I do?
was I snoring this night?

they won't stop
they just don't
they laugh
don't they sense
that I am hurting?
one is sitting on my legs
the other one
has his hands around my neck
breathing
just breathe
I move
I can't
move can't move I let me go I move
STOP IT

okay I start to get worried
do you need to vomit or something?

why does it always
have to be my neck?
I kick
I try to punch
I hate this blanket

hey
do you
do you start crying?
hey
what's going on?
can I touch you?

I should cry louder
I should bite harder
he takes away my clothes
he takes away his own clothes
it's so dark
I
I
he
I
he
i
i
can't
move let me i need go we don't i need breathe

breathe
girl, you need to breathe
hey, I'm here okay?
everything will be okay
calm and breathe
just breathe
i can't feel my body anymore
breathe in
what happened?
breathe out
everything is so fast

sometimes
you can't decide
if it's playing or not
sometimes
people use your weaknesses
and
this time
a brother is violent
in more ways than
I could've expected

but in fact
I just watched two kids
playing on the floor
before my mother found me
crying like a flood

and it's crazy
what a sibling can do to you

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