Love Poison

Attention (Three)

Jema's world stopped.

Three words. Just three words and all around her becomes blurry. All she can clearly see is the woman that she loved unconditionally long time ago. Her T-Rex. The one she willingly gave her heart without an assurance. The one who she had surrendered her body. The one who she had offered her soul.

And now I'm all up on ya, what you expect?
But you're not coming home with me tonight

"Here's your purse, sweetie." Nagmamadaling lapit ni Fhen kay Jema sabay abot ng dala. Nabangga pa nito ng bahagya si Deanna. "Oops, I'm sorry..........Wong???"

"Ey, ayos lang. Hi Emnas!" At saka inilahad ang kamay.

Sa halip na makipagkamay ay hinarap ni Fhen si Jema. "You okay, sweetheart?"

Jema noticed that Deanna had furrowed her eyebrows but she didn't give a damn about it. "Yes, tara, sa labas na muna tayo." She pulled Fhen's hand with her right.

"Jema..."

That's when she realized that all eyes in the room were on them particularly on her hand holding Fhen's and Deanna's holding hers.

An awkward silence deafened the room until Deanna broke it.

"Jema, please. Gusto kitang makausap."

You just want attention, you don't want my heart
Maybe you just hate the thought of me with someone new
Yeah, you just want attention, I knew from the start
You're just making sure I'm never gettin' over you

"Deanna...bitawan mo ang kamay ko." May diin niyang sabi.

But Deanna didn't listen. Instead, she held her hand tighter. Gently but tighter. Her palm is still soft as she can remember but it's a lot warmer now than it did before. It's calming her unstable emotions of combined frustrations, anger and pain, taming her.

"Please...."

Other than talking with Deanna is the most logical choice, her heart gave in.

•••••

"Your hair's a lot shorter. Bagay sa iyo."

Nasa may parking area sila ngayon at alam niyang napaka-informal ng magiging pag-uusap nilang iyon. Nais nga sana ni Deanna na lumayo sila o di kaya ay pumasok sa katapat na restaurant pero umayaw siya.

"Thank you." Still, she accepted the compliment. "Ikaw, ang haba na ng buhok mo ah."

She never had imagined that Deanna would let her hair grew that long kasi tulad nga ng sabi nito noon, gusto nitong ma-maintain ang buhok just below shoulder length.

Deanna just smiled as response and for the second time this evening, she again hold Jema's hand. "I'm sorry for everything. I'm an asshole then."

There's sincerity in her voice but Jema refused to believe her words.

Baby, now that we're now, that we're now, that we're right here standing face-to-face
You already know, already know, already know that you won, oh

Binawi niya ang kamay at pinakawalan naman ito ng kaharap. "Ano pa nga ba?" May hinanakit niyang tugon.

Deanna's eyes turned glassy. It's evident that she's trying to hold back her tears. "I want to make it right, please give me one more chance."

WHATTTTT!!!!!!!

Scenes of the first time they met at the rooftop, the times they were on a trip together, the nights where their moans were still music to her ears, the moment when all she had felt were doubts and fears, and the time when she finally realized her love for her won't be reciprocated ever, flashed like it was just before her eyes. And she can't catch up that her breathing becomes abnormal. She felt her blood boils.