Icy - John Mulaney x OC

8 - It Worked???

I stood in front of the mirror. "Hey, John. Will you be my fake boyfriend so I can spite my brother?" That wouldn't do. "Hey!!! John!!!" Nope. "John, we've-"

"Charlie!" Laura called. "I need to piss!"

Ah, Laura. What a charming woman. I  walked out of the bathroom.

Laura smiled at me. "What were you doing in there?"

I narrowed my eyes at her. "The walls are thin Laura, you know exactly what I was trying to do."

She smiled wider still. "Okay. Well, I called him a bit ago, and he's coming over like, now, so."

"What?" I asked, looking at my watch. It was 9 in the morning and I wasn't even dressed yet. "Laura!"She laughed, and I rushed into my room to change into actually nice clothes. I was putting on shoes when there was a knock at the door. "One second!" I called.

Laura got to the door first. "Hi John! Charlie's here but sit down, I'll make you a cup of coffee."

"Thanks" John said as I emerged from my room. He smiled at me. "Hey Charlie," He said. "Are you okay? You kind of left in a hurry yesterday."

I hoped he hadn't been worried about me. "I'm fine now," I said. "But I do have a... Favor to ask you."

"Sure, anything." John said.

I laughed awkwardly. "Might not want to promise that just yet..." I mumbled.

"What?" John asked.

"Oh! It's just," I took a breath. "So my brother came over yesterday, I told you about him, and Thomas, the guy who he cheated with was there too and they invited me to their wedding. Then they poked fun at me but Laura got mad and said that I would go to the wedding with my boyfriend, who she told them was... You." I finished, taking a deep breath in.

John's face was pink. "What?"

"Laura told them you were my boyfriend, and I was wondering if you would be my fake boyfriend for the wedding, because I don't wan't to look like a fool in front of James and Thomas." I said. "Please don't make me repeat it."

John stood up. "Really sorry, can I talk to Laura for a sec?" He turned and all but ran into the kitchen.

I put my head in my hands. This was going to mess up everything. I could hear frantic whispering coming from the kitchen, but I didn't bother listening. I knew what was happening. In a minute, John would come out of the kitchen, tell me he couldn't help me, and leave. This had seemed like such a good idea when I was fueled by rage yesterday, but now... not so much.

I was pretty sure that at this point, my life was over. I mean, I was getting turned town by famous funnyman John Mulaney. Yeah, things couldn't get worse. He would probably tell all his famous friends about me.

The whole situation was just so humiliating. Of course he would say no! Who would say yes to this crazy scheme. He was in there now trying to find a way to- hopefully- let me down gently. And James would know I was a huge fake. So my day was going great, and it was only 9:45.

I sat like that for a minute before someone came back and sat next to me.

"Charlie?" John asked hesitantly.

I looked up and his face was very red, and he was smiling a little bit. "Yeah?" I asked.

"I'd love to." He said.

I stood up. "Really!?" I exclaimed.

John stood up too. "Really!" He laughed.

"Jesus Christ, John. I could kiss you right now!"

He blushed even redder, if it were possible, and mumbled something.

I didn't hear him. "What?"

He smiled at me. "Nothing!" He laughed.

I smiled back. "Thank you, really."

"Of course."

We locked eyes for a second. I hadn't thought about what I was saying, but thinking about it now, I don't think what I had said was completely wrong. I wouldn't mind kissing him. Purely platonically, of course. I just kind of wondered what it would be like.

I shook my head. It was like I had told Laura yesterday, I don't have time to unpack all of that. I'll just get through the wedding, and then see how I feel.

John put his hand on my shoulder. Subconsciously, I leaned into the touch, consciously, I realized what I was doing and got embarrassed. I didn't make a move to get away, because that would probably make John suspicious that I liked him or something.  "Are you good?" Asked John. "You just started shaking your head like a crazy person." He looked genuinely concerned. It was kinda cute. Stop thinking that, Charlie!!!

"Yeah, i'm fine." I said. "Just running through Ideas in my head about how to destroy my brother's spirit on the inside and have it not affect the wedding."

John nodded, clearly confused. "Right." He said.

Suddenly something dawned on me. "Oh, God." I said.

"What?" John asked anxiously.

"I just realized, my whole family's going to be there. I'm not thrilled about that. Oh, and we're going down to rural Texas. You're a city twink, can you even handle that???" I said.

John looked at me for a second and then started laughing.

"Stop!" I said, pushing his arm off my shoulder and crossing my arms. "This is a legitimate concern!"

John kept laughing, despite my complaints. "Sorry, it's just... You're no hunk yourself."

I gasped. "Excuse you, sir. I'm from the country. Just because i'm small doesn't mean i'm not strong. James is the same height and size as me, and he works on a farm, digging and planting and lifting all day. And I can do everything he can! Just because you have about the same amount of strength as a baby wipe doesn't mean I do." I said with a straight face.

John raised his eyebrows. I smiled at him. "Are you... Joking?" He asked slowly.

"Very much so, yes. Well, insult wise, anyway. I could hold my weight on a farm."

John broke out into a smile. "You're weird, Charlie."

I smiled back. "Aw, you love me. Admit it."

He turned a bit pink for some reason and hesitated, but grinned at me and said "Yeah, of course."

I giggled. Why did I keep giggling?

John looked around and then at me. "Hey, do you want to go somewhere?" He asked.

"Like where?"

"I was thinking like out for lunch somewhere." John suggested. "We can take the bus."

I nodded. "Sure. Is Laura coming?"

Laura appeared in the doorway. "No, I'm gonna stay here. You guys go ahead without me."

John gave her a look. Gratefulness? I wondered why. 

"Okay." I said. "See you, then."

Laura smiled. "Have fun."