This is it, today is the day you would talk to Jack. The night before you had sleeplessly convinced yourself that talking to Jack would be for the best. It could possibly contain all the rapid thoughts that roam inside your head, seeming to contaminate every brain cell and kill them off, making every day an emotional ride for you. You also tried telling yourself that Alice might just be right. She wasn't usually keen on subjects, at least, not to the point where she would pry so hard into your life that she knew it was hurting you and kept it up still. She must know something good will come out of it, even just speaking to Jack. And to be honest, you kinda thought so as well. There is a bigger picture being overseen, the missing puzzle piece is right there in front of you that you refuse to glance at. Maybe doing this, it will somehow create a better character of yourself. Rather than the depressing freak everyone walks by, not knowing how much tears you shred at night just to get by and dealing with the war that is constantly getting fought and progressively getting worse. The two sides cannot agree on one thing, so they shed blood until there is a supposed victor, when really, even after all the carnage and blood shed through vicious fighting, there is no winner, but a fight that was lost unfairly. If both sides were truly fit, not one would lose, nor one would fight, since they would both be smart enough to realize the pathetic outcomes and misdemeanor of the whole situation. The fight lives on, however, in your head for an eternity. It feeds in your fear and drinks up all your happiness to where there is nothing left. Until you are empty.
After all of these repulsive thoughts, you have allowed yourself to succumb to the fact that Jack may be the only exit out of this torturous world you, with nothing to thrive for. He is the exit at the end of the long road you have driven on for so many years of your life, trapped and vulnerable in a state of decay.
You exited these thoughts once more, and found yourself in science class. You knew it was only the 2nd period of the day, but it had felt like years of your life have passed by, and you suddenly felt old and vulnerable. History class had exhausted you during 1st period. Nothing ever interesting caught your eyes. It felt like all the same material and lessons were being taught, you never caught a difference and it felt like the same thing over and over again going on for an eternity. However, you did survive, and that was a win in your book. So you sat in Science Class, starting up to the front of the class. To say the least, Science class never really did bother you, it was just the students who behaved like wild animals with little maturity. It seemed as if they had no idea what they were doing or saying half the time they were acting out, which honestly, did seem quite funny at times. You had so many mixed feelings for so many subjects you never knew what to feel. The thing that you have the most mixed combination of emotions for, however, was the black clothed, green dyed hair and blue eyed Jack.
He sat right next to you, seeming interested in what the teacher was explaining, yet, he also seemed quite bored. You knew you could see the sparkle of liveliness but also the frown of emptiness. It created a lot of misunderstanding between him and his friends, since the man did like to show his emotions clearly, however many ways he could.
You wanted to talk to him, now would be the perfect time, without his friends around, anyone really surrounding you to hear your conversation, you wanted nothing more than to speak to the man. But you were also terrified. You didn't know at all what he thought of you, he could be faking all his acts of kindness, he could be hiding something underneath, or plainly said, just not like you. It was extremely cringy to even think he might, but your heart fluttered at the thought.
Jack happened to be your lab partner, and honestly, you didn't mind. He didn't seem to care either, and you two always did the lessons you were required to get done without a fret. This also made you feel secure next to him. He was right there, and with him basically right at your side, you felt as if you would always be protected, and even this thought sent you to make a disgusted expression. You couldn't believe yourself, but yet the thought and emotions wouldn't shut up over the subject.
YOU ARE READING
An Angel With No Wings
Romansa(Y/N) was a young girl with dreams. She told herself every night that she would accomplish these dreams, only to suddenly fall over a cliff and suddenly feel like she can't do anything. She hates herself, her looks, her personality, she can't stand...
