Dark Moves Of Love ~ Neymar Jr

Chapter 20

"I want that too. I want us to be friends."

I had the faint impression that he stopped breathing for a second, the moment he heard me. Like it hurt him to hear that.

Could it have hurt him as much as it did me?

He seemed to be at a loss for words and it felt like centuries passed when it was only seconds.

But Neymar couldn't have wanted anything other than friendship from me. Because if he did, he wouldn't have gotten back together with Bruna.

"I want that too." He said, his eyes on the ground. I don't think anyone watching him say that would have believed him.

Once again I thought of the fact that I had single-handedly made a person who was the embodiment of joy and happiness, so miserable.

There must be something terribly wrong with me. I mentally pictured myself walking on the street, holding a sign. "Keep away, she sucks the life out of you."

 "Okay." I said, feeling stupid, wanting to say a million other things.

Suddenly he smiled. I was startled because the smile looked genuine. He was either the best liar in the world or he had a change of heart in the past few seconds.

He realized I had spotted the difference. "I get to have you in my life, friend. Thank you for forgiving me."

I nodded.

He stepped towards me, only the car door between us. I was leaning on the car because my ankle hurt too much. "I am so sorry for my stupidity. For all the Juninho crap. It was awful, the worse thing I have ever done. I won't pretend it was funny, even if it started as a joke. But it did win me you, a great friend."

I gave him a small smile, a fake one, unsure of what to say. Every time he said the word friend, it felt like he punched me in the chest. I had that habit, I thought to myself. I liked guys and managed to become their best friend. My nervousness always got the best of me. And I was the one that had said the friend word first. I was the one that stopped him from talking. Who knows what he would have said.

I will never know. And Neymar was my friend now. And in a sense he was right. I'd rather have him as a friend than nothing else.

"Can we get back in? My ankle is killing me."

"Yeah, yeah of course! Are you sure we shouldn't call the doctor?" He asked me.

"No, it's not that bad I think, as long as I don't step on it."

He helped me get in and got in himself. We drove the rest of the way without saying anything, only smiling at each other if our eyes met on the rearview mirror. It felt lukewarm, like trying to suppress feelings.

When we reached the compound Neymar woke Alex up and came around to help me. I leaned on him as we walked to my room, saying goodnight to Alex. I was vaguely aware of our proximity, thinking back on the night out we had in town. Everything was different.

"Thanks." I said when we reached the door.

"No problem. If you need anything or are in too much pain call me." He told me.

"Sure." I said. "Goodnight."

"Sweet dreams Livvie." He said, giving me one last smile. And with that he left.

I got in my room and started getting ready for bed as quickly as I could, given my ankle. I got in bed and closed the lights when I heard a knock on the door.

I felt nervous and glad at the same time. He was back and he wanted to say what I didn't allow him to say before. And maybe I was wrong. Maybe I did want to listen.

I opened the door and came face to face with Alex.

"Alex are you alright? What are you doing here?" I asked as I stepped aside for him to get in. We walked back to my bed, I got under the covers and he sat on the side.

"I wanted to see you." He said. "I..." he started saying.

And he kissed me.

The first thing that came to my mind was the smell of alcohol. I was startled not only because that was so out of the blue but also because I found myself kissing him back.

The kiss was all in, passionate and sweet, a low inhibitions kiss.

When we broke apart I was breathless.

"That was unexpected." I managed to say. My guilt was starting to overwhelm me.

"Not really." He smiled.

And with that he pulled me in for another kiss.

And all thoughts vanished.

~

Waking up in the morning I realized my ears were still ringing. When I stood up I almost lost my balance, grabbing the dresser with my hands and holding on to it for dear life. My ankle hurt. I looked at my bed. Alex was sleeping soundly. He was only wearing his boxers but his torso was covered by the sheets.

I went to the bathroom to wash my face. My head hurt way too much but that was to be expected since I had drunk so much last night. I had dark circles under my eyes. I went back to the room and found clothes to change to. I put my pajamas in the laundry basket and headed towards the restaurant.

There weren't many people there that early, but one of them was David. I got breakfast quickly and joined him.

"Morning sunshine!" He said when he saw me, giving me a warm smile.

I sat next to him without saying anything.

"I was just about to come wake you up." He said. I was glad he didn't have to. The thought of David walking in on Alex and me terrified me.

"Why?"

"It's Rio day!" he said.

"Oh, I had forgotten about that." I whined. I wasn't really in the mood to go. I wanted to stay alone, think things through, but somehow I didn't think that that would be possible.

"C'mon! Show some excitement! I have planned a wonderful day!"

"By the way thanks for forgetting about me yesterday." I told him.

"What are you talking about?" he asked and I realized he had no idea.

When I told him he exclaimed: "So sorry Livvie, I had no idea! And how did you leave?"

"Neymar." I said.

He turned around to look at me, his eyes wide. "Neymar?"

"Yeah, after he dropped his girlfriend off."

"I have no idea what that boy is thinking." He said.

"Why not?" I asked ironically. "He dropped off his girlfriend and then he gave a stranded friend a ride."

"C'mon, it's not like that."

"That's exactly how it is. We talked about it. We are just friends. The matter is solved."

"Really?" he mocked me. "You are just his friend. You were never friends to begin with!"

"What are you talking about? Of course we were!"

"Please, even when he was Juninho there was nothing friendly about you two."

"What we were like then? Enemies?" I said sarcastically.

"You know what I mean." He said annoyed.

Alex walked into the restaurant at that moment and my breath caught. When he spotted me he let out a big smile and my hope that he didn't remember last night shattered. He started walking towards us.

"Goodmorning David." He said. "Morning beautiful." He told me.

David almost choked on his orange juice. Ignoring him I gave Alex a small smile.

"I'm gonna get breakfast and be right back." He said.

 "What the hell Livvie?" David said when Alex was far enough. " Didn't I say honesty? You screwed it up! You both did!"