INSTA-Daddy

34

I caught up with my brother and mother right outside the hospital. Tom was somewhere behind them, leaning on his motorbike.

Wes had already gone home while Liz stayed put. She was talking to Gustin when I got to them. They stopped though the moment they saw me.

"Where have you been?" My mom asked. I couldn't tell her exactly where I went. They never knew Cameron and they definitely didn't knew I used to date anyone other than Tom. Well, not that we ever really used to date. But... yeah.

I only shook my head as a response. Tom urged me to go with him on the bike but mother insisted I take a cab with them. He didn't even try to argue and just agreed-- no words spoken.

So we arrived home. Mother and Gustin stayed for awhile. Tom was silent the whole time.

Actually, he head directly to the bedroom and never bothered to come out.

"Don't forget. Saturday, we'll visit Dr. Gillan for the CT Scan..." She said to start up the conversation. And the rest is history.

When it already got dark, they went on their way to take Liz home before going to theirs.

As soon as the house got quiet, Tom finally exited the room.

"Could you please wear some shirt," I wailed. His upper body was naked again and I didn't like the tingling sense it gives me everytime I see his bare body like that. There's like this electricity flowing through my every veins.

He only made a grunting sound and sauntered to the sofa where he flopped down, reached for the TV remote and be the lazy ass Tom again.

"You should have seen Cameron," I mumbled. "He looked like a squashed potato."

I heard him snicker. I rolled my eyes, sauntered to the sofa, and sat beside him.

"How can you be laughing? You put someone in the hospital!?" I scowled in a rough whispery voice.

He snickered again. "I always put someone in a hospital."

I sighed in disbelief. "Sooner or later you're officially going to be a father. You need to straighten up your actions Tom. You need to stop being Dirty Tom. I don't want the baby to grow up becoming like y--"

"Like what?" He gawked at me with his stoic piercing eyes. "..like me?" I noticed the bitterness in his voice when he said that.

"Don't tell me what to do. You're not my wife."

I snorted and shook my head. It was then that I realized how I got the courage to actually tell him that. For a second there, I felt like I was..  like I was his wife.

I just thought that there was already something blossoming between us. Maybe that's why day by day I have become more and more confident around him.

He called me his girl last night. He went berserk at Cameron last night. I just thought that maybe.. maybe I was beginning to become someone special for him.

That if I plead him to become good, he'll do it. Because I was special.

I guess I was wrong.

Maybe this was a bad idea after all. Maybe I shouldn't have let this lie go so far. Now I'm stuck with this feelings. How it started, I don't know. When? I don't know either. It just happened.

And now I'm developing the emotion of sadness when he said, 'You're not my wife.'

"Fine," I said, giving up trying. Why do I even bother. I pulled myself to stand up when there was a sudden grip on my wrist and I found myself plopping back down beside Tom.

I gasped while my heart did a quick hard pump. My shoulder pressed against Tom's shoulder as I plopped down.

He circled his arm around my shoulder and locked me in with his side-hug. I went stunned for a second, gluing a stare of bafflement at him.

Here he goes again. Doing actions I can't decipher. I shifted a look at the TV Screen where a the movie Bad Neighbors 2 was showing.

"If you're going to watch TV all night, I'm going to my room and study," I muttered as I remembered my best friends' reminder about the upcoming exam. I shrugged myself off him and he freely let go, blewing a sigh.

As I sauntered my way to the room, he briefly called out and I paused.

"Wait," he said. I turned around to face him. He wasn't even looking back at me.

"What?" I grunted as I reached for the doorknob. I waited for an answer but instead there was none. I rolled my eyes and went in, shutting the door close, making sure to create a loud thump so he'd have the hint of my frustration.

I gently dropped down on the bed, grabbed for a pillow, dug my face into it, and screamed every emotions I've collected into my chest. It also seemed like my baby was screaming along with me from my belly.

Questions were forming in my head. All swirling and dancing in my mind-- questions that were bugging me.

When I talked to Cameron earlier, and I said that I loved Tom... it was the truth. I think it was the truth.

Why did I even say it? Why did I even felt this?  Why am I stuck in this kind of situation?!

More set of thoughts jumped inside my brain.

When Cameron said he wanted me back, I could always say yes. After all, he was really the one who got me pregnant. But then Jennifer would throw all possibilities to make my life miserable.

If it was just me, I can take it. But I have a baby now. She's so evil there's no doubt she'll have the mind to do something negative to my baby with Cameron (whom she stole from me in the first place).

As long as Jennifer's got the hots for him, it could never be.

Now let's go to Tom. First, he shows he cares. Then he tells me things that shoves me off. However, when he became the pretend father of my baby (he doesn't know the pretend part), he accepted it. Maybe not happy about it but he took the responsibility and I'm certain he'll take more responsibility as soon as the baby comes out.

Okay, on the first couple of days he had his doubts and complaints, but he  took responsibility anyhow.

Plus, there were no strings attached. The only problem was his attitude. And the fact that he just doesn't seem interested... in me.

Clearly, he's only interested in the baby. Which is a good thing. Right?

Not with me. That's a bad thing. A very bad thing.

I clamped the inside of my palm over my chest. As soon as Tom flashed in my mind, its beating quickened again.

Ugh. I hate this. I love him, he doesn't love me. Someone else says he (still) loves me, someone else loves him.

I... I just don't know anymore.

I picked up my bag, pulled Wes and Liz, and mine, notebooks out and flipped the pages afterwards.

Another pause. Another one-second thought.

Screw this. Screw Tom. Screw Cameron.

Studying would take my mind off this.

*****
A/N

Writer's block is screwing with me !!! I need to fasten the story or else I might make another turn. And I don't want that to happen!