The Exchange Student, the Pop Prince and the Raffle Tickets

Chapter Forty Three: We Took Those Steps..

I still need you, But you’re not here.   I still need you, Wherever you are.   I still need you, You didn’t need me.   I still need you, For forever and a day.   Dad and Lily paid for the tickets and the accommodation even though I had enough money to do it myself. I guess it was their way of apologising for not believing in me. To say that I was keeping myself calm for both Bindi and I was such a lie. I held Bindi’s hand all the way there. All nine and a bit hours to California. I made a small joke about us both shedding our layers of clothes as soon as we took in the Californian sunlight. With Bindi by my side, with her obviously fake Rayban sunglasses, I studied her trying to figure out what everyone was going to say about her new look, about the way she smoked a packet a day and her odd new American/British accent. I had emailed Jesse the night before we boarded the plane. She’s coming home.                        

“Stop focusing on me like that… it’s starting to really freak me out.” This new Bindi I had realised, while I had been staring at her oddly, was more abrupt. She was still quiet but when she said something you knew she meant it and she wasn’t exactly polite in doing so.  

The time came all too soon. Getting into that cab bought me horrible deja-vu from the day I arrived to join the search just over a year ago.

“I’m going to warn you now,’ I told Bindi as we stopped outside the house. “This is going to suck.”

It took a lot of strength to get out of that taxi; for both Bindi and I.  

We took those steps up to the house and suddenly, Joseph and Sarah’s faces appeared from behind the front door. One thing was clear; I knew I would remember this day forever. Remember the faces of Joseph and Sarah Moretto. It had seemed like I had been away from the Moretto’s for years by the look on their faces; they looked old and stressed with bags under both of their eyes.  

In my head I was freaking out, asking all the questions under the sun why on Earth I had wanted to put myself through this again!? For some reason, this all felt so unreal and odd and stupid and awkward and horrifying and pointless and yet… it felt so meaningful. I wondered about everything in those few minutes. What would I do if they all hugged forgiving each other within seconds of seeing one another? What would I do if they started arguing over whose fault was whose? If I was panicking this bad, what was going through Bindi’s head right now… Bindi shook her head. She looked just as panicky as me. She looked back at me and we shared a glance that said that we were going through the same emotions, same thoughts.  

I felt myself taking deep breaths still holding Bindi’s hand, until I felt it forcefully slip away from mine. “No… no… I don’t want to see them.”

Bindi was less than a few seconds on seeing her parents for the first time in over a year after running away. I looked at my best friend. “Bindi, I know this is hard but I know you can do this... We can do this together.”  

Bindi quickly turned back towards the awaiting taxi driver unloading our luggage while I tried to catch up to her. “Look, this is it.’ I shouted after her. ‘Stay or go. It’s up to you…but it’s nearly been two and a half years… Isn’t it time we moved on?”

“You don’t know what it was like–” She whispered staring at the house behind me. I reassured her. “I heard the stories. If I had to do this all over again, just to find you, just to bring you back here to this very place so that we can move on, I’d do it a thousand times over.’ I held out my hand for Bindi. ‘I’m done with suffering. It’s time for us to grow up.”