Fire And Ice (Lost&Found Series)✔

19. THE AFTERMATH OF REJECTION

XANDER'S POV:

As soon as she left, everything came crashing down on me. I gulped and made my way towards my room. I saw Mom move towards me from the corner of my eye but dad stopped her. Good. I don't want anyone saying anything. The whole lounge fell in silence, the sound of my shoes ticking against the floor was the only noise that cut through the tension that hung in the air. Upon reaching my bedroom, I closed the door behind me quietly. I could hear the sounds of people chattering in the distance but it didn't matter. Taking off my shoes and tie, I threw my jacket on the ottoman that lay at the end of my bed. I plopped down on the bed, opening the first two buttons of my shirt, I sighed heavily.

Why? Why now? Why did she confess if she was going to reject? I was so confused because I can bet on my life that I saw her eyes silently pleading to me. For what? I can't figure out. I swear I saw every emotion there ever is, cross her eyes. Fear and confusion, when I got down on my knee. Relief, when I said I will always love and protect her. Joy, mixed with anticipation when I took the box out. Happiness, when her eyes looked at the ring. Awe, when I said how proud am I of her. Shyness, when I said that living with her and being by her side was a blessing. Shock, when I finally asked her to be mine and Anger and hesitation when her eyes scanned the crowd but it was only for a millisecond. I could've easily missed it if I wasn't looking closely at her.

When she took a step back, my heart dropped to my stomach. The moment she spoke and avoided my eyes, I knew she was lying. She tends to avoid eye contact when she is lying. When she glanced up at me, she looked desperate. She wanted to say something but she bit her tongue. The thing that hurt me the most was she didn't let me come near her, let alone touch her.

Ever since she came back, all I've been trying to do is figure out 'WHY' I understand that she needs her time to open up. I want to make her mine, I want to put a label on what we have. I want to mark my territory, call me egoistic, arrogant, typical, whatever but it is what it is.

Sighing heavily, I got up and made my way towards the washroom to wash my face. After doing my business, I grabbed my coat and went outside towards Leo's room. I knocked on it twice and heard him shout a 'come in'

"Hey, what's up?" he asks standing up from the couch and placing his laptop on the table as soon as I walk in.

"Nothing, I am heading out." I say walking towards his balcony.

"Where?" he asks following me out.

"Penthouse." I reply looking ahead at the sunset.

"How are you?" he asks resting his back against the railing and looking at me.

"I don't know Leo, I don't know." I blow out some air and look at him.

"You know she loves you, right?" he asks and I frown.

"I want her trust first than love." I say and he nods his head in agreement, looking down.

"Give it some time." he sighs.

"I can't lose her again. I am afraid I'll lose myself and this time, for good." I say referring back to the time she disappeared. I was a fucking mess, never in the right state of mind. Making bad decisions and drowning myself in alcohol.

"I know man. Are you giving up?" he frowns and gazes at me.

"Yeah." I say and he blinks at me, his mouth slightly open. "After I'm dead." I add and he sighs in relief.

"She'll come around." he says and pats my shoulder. I nod at him and slip into my jacket. She better or I will drag her sweet ass back and tie her so that she can't escape.

"You know where to find me if you want to talk." he says and I pat his back thanking him.

I head out in the garage and see Dante's car missing which makes me frown.