Venom & Oblivion

Chapter 18

It was slowly approaching midnight but Jinyoung could not sleep yet. All the things from the past kept haunting him. For the previous five days, there had been no sign of Mark on the campus. But today, Jinyoung had caught a glimpse of him.

But it was all too quick. Mark was coming out of the principal's office, and when Jinyoung, being quite far from him, tried to approach him, the latter was already gone, out of the sight.

There were only three days left before Mark's departure; and those three days would just pass real quick.

All of this still didn't feel real; the fact that Mark was no more going to be here, why couldn't he, Jinyoung thought, accept it yet? Sometimes, he only wanted to blame himself for building that friendship with Mark, which was now the cause of all sleepless nights and the mental agony.

Holding his food tray, Jinyoung headed for an empty table at the corner. His mind had been downcast these days but now was even worse, as he had found, just a while ago, a pack of rubbish inside his locker.

That had been done by none other than Jong and Seung, he was certain, but then again there was no surprise in that.

"Hey!"

With the voice, both Jong and Seung were already in front of him, deliberately blocking his way. Jinyoung glared at them, which he wouldn't have dared to, before. But the frustration he now felt could surpass all of his fear.

"Get out of my way."

"Oh, you're ordering us now?" Jong frowned, clearly dissatisfied, "Do you know what we can do to you now? We've so many ways to humble snappy guys like you."

Jinyoung gripped his food tray hard and steeled himself not to show his vulnerability, which would just make them triumphant.

"Perhaps, you still remember what a mess you were in, here a long time ago? We don't mind playing that scene again," Seung challenged, raising his eyebrows.

"And this time, there'll be no knight in shining armour of yours," Jong sneered.

"For your information, I'm here."

Jinyoung did not know whether to feel happy or miserable to find Tae Hyun behind Jong and Seung and walking towards them. They turned to the voice and snorted when they saw Tae Hyun.

"What? Are you his dog? Following him around?"

Tae Hyun ignored Jong's words and walked straight to Jinyoung, whose eyes pleaded him not to be involved in this again.

Tae Hyun took the tray from Jinyoung's hands and smiled at him.

"Let's go somewhere else."

"What? Do you think you can just run away from us like that, you cowards? Come on, if you want to take him away, at least try to beat us in a fist-fight!"

Tae Hyun reached out his other hand for Jinyoung's hand and holding it, led him away, saying to Jong and Seung, "You can go fuck yourselves if you're not satisfied!"

Tae Hyun strode forward and Jinyoung had to keep up with him, as the words of Jong and Seung were left behind.

Jinyoung was taken to the bench just outside the canteen and they sat down there.

"Thanks again," Jinyoung muttered.

"No need. Finish your lunch here and then we can go back there to hand back the tray and plates."

Jinyoung nodded, "What about you? Have you finished your lunch? No way, you're going to skip it because of me. Eat half of mine."

"Do you want to go somewhere tonight?" Tae Hyun changed the subject, "I mean, if you want to, I've some places in my mind, which are worth visiting at night."

Jinyoung went silent; he did want to release his mind somewhere but at the same time, he wanted to be alone.

"No, at least not tonight. I've some assignments to work on."

Tae Hyun's face turned to disappointment but a smile returned to his lips in no time.

"Okay then. Next time," he paused a moment to observe Jinyoung's face, "Are you not feeling well? Did they do something else to you before I came?"

"No, not really. I'm just a bit tired. These days have been a bit hectic, I guess."

Jinyoung reassured Tae Hyun with a smile, and it convinced him. Tae Hyun was so nice to him, Jinyoung acknowledged it; but Jinyoung could not help wishing that it were that particular person instead, always offering to stay beside him and reassuring him that he would never be left.

It was two fifteen already, and Jinyoung lost count of how many times he had been pacing about the room.

Mark was leaving today; and although Jinyoung had promised him that he would see him off, he was no more certain if he had the strength to see Mark leaving.

He felt nervous and agitated, with every minute gone by. It was only a matter of less than two hours before Mark would be all gone from this country.

Feeling himself weak at the thought, Jinyoung sat down on the bed and then lay down on it.

The minutes that passed by, terrified him. How could he stay still till it was the time for Mark to leave? He wished he could fall asleep till that time and it would have been less nerve-wracking.

Why was he suffering in the first place? From the elementary school, to the middle school and then to the high school, there had been his childhood friends who he had had to leave in changing the schools. But all of this had been bearable. Nothing had been as bad as this.

To top it all, Mark had bullied him and had even announced that their friendship was over.

Then, why was he suffering now? Then those times Mark had embraced him, or he had embraced Mark, the warmth that he felt those times. His tears for Mark and his heartbeats.

Was all of this - could it be love? Did he love Mark? Before, he had been afraid of being in a relationship, but now had his feelings changed?

The more his thoughts wandered, the clearer it became to him that he had been in love with Mark all along. Since the beginning, perhaps. Only his fear and ignorance had been in the way.

Jinyoung sat up; if Mark knew that he loved him, Mark might not leave. It was all because Mark thought Jinyoung would never love him back.

Jinyoung looked at the table-clock, it was five to three. There was not much time left; panic overtook him again but he shouldn't give it up yet.

He changed his pyjamas into a T-shirt and pants, quickly, and taking his wallet, went downstairs in haste.

He could have phoned Mark, if only the number had not been lost, with the loss of contact between them. He could only blame himself.

Now the only way was to make it to the airport within half an hour at most, and the rest, how he would find Mark there, he could not think of it yet. He could only pray that fate would not be cruel to them this time.