violet evergreen ☀︎ a david dobrik fanfiction

24.

from the outside it would look like violet was exactly the same.

she went to work, went to university and spent time with her friends.

but her shifts were exhausting, her university work was sloppy and her friends, well they weren't really her friends.

they were kids from her course, mostly fake la socialites who were only with her because of her weirdly high instagram following.

no ollie, no david, no 'vlog squad'.

you wouldn't realise she was so alone, every single moment of her day was shared with others after all, but really she was miserable.

she knew david would never tell the others what happened that night, which is why it hurt so much more. the people she had considered her close friends had allowed her to drop off the face of the earth with not even a text message of concern.

don't get her wrong, she was aware she would never truly be apart of their group, that was obvious and she did not mind. but she had not seen the group in almost a month and not one person was even curious?

she knew she deserved it.

the fans on the other hand had not let her disappearance go unnoticed. some thought she had simply moved back to england, after all they had known that she was only here for her education. but others, they were spot on, guessing that something had happened between the two to make them cut ties.

more than anything, violet was just trying to forget everything and move on, which became near impossible when she noticed a message from liza.

i can't believe you would do this to me, i was nothing but nice to you. i even showed you forgiveness when you and david were sneaking around behind everyones backs. but he just told me what happened in vegas. us girls are meant to stick together :(

violets heart stopped, tears immediately pouring from her eyes as she read over the message over and over again, hoping that it was just her imagination.

she didn't know what to do. she had been feeling awful about the kiss for all these weeks but it was nothing quite like the guilt and regret that was coursing throughout her veins right now.

she was ashamed and furious with herself.

violet needed to change.

she couldn't be this blissfully ignorant girl anymore. she wasn't just hurting herself, she had single handedly managed to ruin every single relationship she had because of her naivety.

it was time for her to wake up. to stop denying herself the chance to love, and for others to love her back.

her fingers tremoured as she fumbled them across the keyboard, continuously typing messages.

liza
'i know you will never forgive me and i will never forgive myself either. i don't think any amount of 'i'm sorry' could suffice as a good enough apology.'

ollie
'i have always been a sharp girl, until it comes to feelings- that's when i'm ridiculously oblivious. i want you to know i truly never realised your feelings for me and if i did i would never have led you on like i did. this, i'm now aware is exactly what i did. i led you on and i don't even know where to begin apologising. i'm sorry ollie, you were my first true friend in this strange country, and knowing i ruined our beautiful relationship will haunt me forever.'

david
'i promised myself i would never contact you again but i need to get this off my chest. i'm sorry for what happened, please try your hardest to not let this come between you and liza, what the two of you share is incredible and i can't sleep at night knowing that i destroyed that.

and with that, she fell into a deep sleep, making an oath with herself to never fuck up this badly again.