Another day
And another
Each one I become
More and more like my mother
I try to be good
And work hard like my brother
But whenever I try
To do what she asks and what she wants
I feel smothered
I have all these thoughts
And I have all these feelings
About who I am
And about who I'm being
I wanna just stop
And let go of this needing
To be someone else and
Just be happy with me.
I want short hair
But I can't pull off a bob
I'm too tired to shower
so I look like a slob
I complain about being broke
but I won't get a job
I just want to do things right
But it just makes my head throb
I want to just be me
But who I am sucks
I want to leave and travel far away
But all I have is a broken truck
I try to clear my head
But it's just full of muck
I need to make plans for my future
But everything I thought I knew is fucked
I don't know how I've made it this far
It just has to be pure luck
My life alone is
Coming so soon
The whole adulting thing
And crying in the afternoon
God I don't want to grow up
What I'd give to be the man in the moon
Just scoop out all
These fears with a big wooden spoon
Serve them to someone else
So I can stop feeling like a loon
Before they throw me in the bin
And psychology majors can
Watch me like a cartoon
I just want to hide away
From the world for awhile
Wrap myself in a cocoon
And when I come out a butterfly
Everyone will swoon
But that's not how life works
It just surrounds you with feelings of doom
I had all these plans
And I had all these goals
I was going to work hard
And play hard
But now I just don't have the soul
All the ideas I had
Are now dust in the wind
And they crumbled in my hand
Like charcoal
I never have the energy
Or motivation
To do anything but scroll
Through my phone
Like an addict
And now this is the toll
I'm sixteen
And sad
All my thoughts are unoriginal
Or bad
Everyone tells me I'm supposed to be glad
And if I'm not then I'm depressed
But only just a tad
Because if I really was
It'd be totally rad
Because it beats being upset
Or tempered and mad
I guess that's why we're all
On antidepressants
And drinking with chads
Because feeling anything at all
Is about as appealing as salad
So this has been everything I hate
I'm far to shallow
And I'm far too deep
Everything I say is annoying
And I can never take risks
Or even a small leap
No matter how hard I try
I'll never get into this trend
Of being the black sheep
I just want everyone to love me
Even if that makes me sound like a creep
I should just stop talking
I shouldn't have made a peep
YOU ARE READING
We All Grow Up
Poesiai started this collection of thoughts and feelings before i had really grown up. legally i'm supposed to be grown up now, but i'm still writing. i think it's going to be a long time before this collection feels complete, and i feel grown up.
