I was just a machine, but it wasn't really me... (Connor x OC) D: BH

༻ 1, Life without emotions ༺

ROSE'S POV

The world is not like I imagined as a child. Not even here, in my beloved city, in Detroit. In the world's forge... In the android capital of the world... The truth is that the world is dark and cold... Harsh and violent... Unfair and brutal... But at this moment I felt only one thing. Peace... I was surrounded by silence and calmness. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I could feel the rays of the sun gently touch my skin through the windows. And I could feel the scent of fresh paint in the air. For a brief moment I forgot the reality, then I opened my eyes again...

"So?" the harmonious silence was broken by the voice of an old man who was waiting for my answer, sitting in his wheelchair. "What is your verdict, Rose?"

"Honestly? I have no idea..." I replied with a soft sigh.

"Just tell me what kind of feelings you have when you look at it." I did as the man asked me. I crossed my arms as I started looking at the tiny details of the huge painting in front of me. It was mostly in the shades of sapphire blue and black colors.

"Yes... There is something about it. But it makes me feel only the negative emotions. Like fear, sorrow, doubt... And some anger." I admitted honestly. Meanwhile, I couldn't stop looking at the wonderful painting. It was made by one of the most famous painter of Detroit, Carl Manfred.

"You don't even like to talk about those emotions, do you?"

"You know me, Carl..." I answered with a fake smile on my face, looking at the other paintings in the studio. I knew all of them well, but even after many years I couldn't get tired of admiring them. There was something about them. Something I couldn't quite define. "The problem is that every single day when I leave my home and focus my attention on the world around me I encounter only with these emotions. Hatred, brutality, disrespect and so on..." I explained, then I let out a disappointed sigh. "You said it yourself that this world doesn't like those who are different. But I want to be different! What's more, I am already different and I'm proud of that! I won't let anyone tell me who I should be or what I should do!" I said confidently, then looked back at the biggest and latest painting of the studio. "Oh, and my other opinion about your painting... I like the shades of the blue and the black. But of course, I do not judge by the color..."

At that moment a sincere smile appeared on Carl's face. We've been good friends for seven years already, so he knew exactly how I was thinking about the world. What's more, we looked at each other as a family member. He always treated me as her independent granddaughter and I always treated him as my protective grandfather. Of course, our good relationship was not only determined by our own opinion about the world, but also by the way the world itself thought about us. We were outsiders in the eyes of the others from the beginning. Artists who were locked in their own mind palace by the outside world. Individuals who didn't fit into the reality they lived in. But this has never prevented us from becoming those who we are now.

"Would you like a cup of tea?" Carl's voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah... A cup of tea would be good now." I replied, then helped Carl as we headed to the huge living room, leaving the bright studio behind. The view of the most spacious part of the Manfred residence was magnificent, as always. I've always felt like I am on an exhibition of an art museum. This was probably due to the thousands of old books, the antique furniture and the various stuffed wild animals.

"By the way, as for the arts... Did you already choose your priority?"

"You mean between the painting and the photography? Not yet, but maybe I never will... You know I love both, so it's not easy to choose." I admitted, while I sat down on the blood-red couch. I accepted the cup of fresh herbal tea, thanked him gratefully and finally took a sip of it.