Citrus and Wine | Jung Jaehyun

Chapter 4

The sunlight coming through the half-open blinds woke you up. You laid in bed trying to recall how you got here, the last memory in your head was laying down on the couch, crying your eyes out because of him. You know he didn't mean to make you cry but you couldn't help but feel bitter. Your childhood memories were mostly bad, your dad was an alcoholic who cheated on your mother more than twice. He would come home and scream at you, saying how you ruined his life by being born, even though you were not the firstborn. Your mom always protected you and your siblings from him, but she never left him. You couldn't comprehend why she couldn't just leave, take her children with her and escape the abuse her husband was giving her.

"Why did you get pregnant? I bet those kids are not even mine." You heard a voice yell.

"Stop saying that about your children, why don't you man up and take care of them?" you heard your mom argue back. "I don't care if you cheat on me, but at least show some love to your kids." You saw your dad lift his hand, your mom rapidly grabbing it, stopping him from doing what intended to. "Don't you dare lay a finger on me."

That day was the first time you saw your dad act like that, he always shouted but it never got to the point where he tried to hit your mother. That was the day you swore that as soon as you turned 18 you were going to leave your home and pursuit your dreams elsewhere. And here you were now, almost there, your dream had always been to own a fashion magazine for every single women and men out there who didn't 'fit' the beauty standards, you wanted to show that everyone was beautiful in their own way regardless of gender, religion, color or sexual orientation, even though it took you so long to believe this about yourself.

Jaehyun couldn't sleep after he saw you crying, he beat himself up for making you cry yourself to sleep. Sure, he liked teasing you and getting on your nerves, but he never meant to hurt you. He went in the shower and let the hot water slide down his body, closing his eyes, he used his right hand to lean forward on the wall. 'she's right, I am an asshole.' He was so lost in thought that he didn't even realize how long he had been in the shower, till he heard a knock on the door.

"I'll be done in a minute!" he said and got a soft 'okay' in reply. He was used to you being all like 'hurry up! Wasting water is bad!' followed by a lecture about how people in other places did not have water, a lecture that lasted until he got out of the shower. But this time you said nothing, he knew you were still upset, and even though he just raised his voice at you, he understood. His dad was not the best person in the world. Jaehyun didn't know about your family, and you didn't know about his. His father was the owner of a big company, and he always pressured Jaehyun into following his steps, except he didn't want to. His father ruined the lives of many people in order to get to where he was and Jaehyun wanted nothing but to help others, he wanted to become successful without his father's help.

He left the bathroom and entered his room. As soon as you heard his door close you opened yours and took a shower, a cold shower. Cold showers always helped you feel better, the coldness of it making you feel fresh and calm. You didn't take long, you left to your room after staring at yourself in the mirror. You changed into comfortable clothes to go and pick up the groceries later that day. For a while you just laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, not wanting to go out while Jaehyun was outside, probably waiting to apologize, or at least you liked to think he was going to. Not that you needed him to, you don't care.

Someone was knocking on the door and Jaehyun was the only one who could hear. He opened the door and was surprised by the person on the other side. Johnny.

"What are you doing here?" Jaehyun asked, suspicious as to why the tall guy showed up uninvited.

"Can't I come and visit my best friend?" Johnny asked flashing Jaehyun a smile.

"No...." he squinted his eyes as his friend tried to come in. "Let's just go hang out at Mark's."

"Is your roommate home?"

"That's none of your business," he said and pushed Johnny out the door, closing it afterward.

You, on the other hand, fell asleep again. Waking up in the middle of the day, you went to the living room after making sure Jaehyun was nowhere to be seen, he had been out for about 4 hours already. You cooked something and ate.

"I should call mom." You grabbed your phone and typed in the number. It took three rings for the phone to be answered. "Hey! Mom, how are you?" you said smiling softly.

"Hi baby, I am doing better now, how are you?" she asked with a sweet voice, all the memories of her coming to your mind, you missed her so much.

"I'm doing good." You sniffled. Tears forming in your eyes.

"Don't cry, honey. You are chasing your dream and you know that I'm proud of you." She said making you let out a sob. "I love you so much."

"I love you more." You whispered and wiped your tears away.

"Oh please, stop pretending that you care. You ran away from home when you saw the opportunity." You heard a voice say. It was not your mother's. It was your sister's.

"You don't know what you're saying."

"Yes, I do, you ran away from home as soon as you turned 18, you knew mom was sick yet you still left me here with her."

"I'm working to give mom what she needs, I pay for her home, I pay for her medical bills, I pay for all of her needs. Sure, you are physically there with her, but you don't do shit." You raised your voice.

"I take care of her while you slut around with your roommate. You think I don't know why you chose him to be your roommate?" she yelled back. "What is he? Rich? Is that what you want from him? His money?"

"I don't know if he's rich or not. I don't care. I work for my own shit, I don't 'slut' around with my roommate." You were so into the fight that you didn't notice Jaehyun enter the living room. "All you do is sit around at home, you don't even take care of mom, you had me hire a nurse. You don't care, you're just waiting for her to die so you can keep everything I've given her."

"I don't need anything from you. Dad was right, you are selfish, you care more about your stupid dream than your family."

"It's not my fault you were always dad's favorite, while I had to take all the verbal abuse from him, you know I had to leave, he wanted me to leave.And now I am the selfish one? Fuck off." You yelled and hung up the phone. You knew your mom hated to see you both fight, but you couldn't help it when she was always coming at you for moving away from home, but you had to, you had to help your family. You felt a hand gently touch your shoulder, making your turn around. Jaehyun was home. You wiped your tears.

"How long have you been standing there?" You asked, and his face softened. His usual smirk and dark eyes were replaced with worry.

"Y/n, are you okay?" he asked and you scoffed.

"How about you mind your own business?" you asked bitterly. "You mind your own and I will mind mine, just like you told me to."

"Y/n, wait, I am so-"

"Save it, Jaehyun. I don't want your pity just cause you heard what I said about my father." You slapped his hand away and left to do the grocery shopping.

"I don't pity you. I feel the same way you do." He whispered and sat down on the couch.

You didn't want to yell at him, but you couldn't let him see you like this. That's not the girl your mother raised.