Jaded

A Lost Cause

Kayla's POV

The next day, I woke up to Paul kissing on my neck and chest. I was still attitude-ish from the night before. I wasn't in the mood. He just feels that I'm going to just let last night go. Nope, not in the least. I pushed him off of me and he looked at me like he was crazy.

"What?" He asks looking confused.

"No."

"No?" He asks making a crazy face at me.

"Yes. No. I guess I'm just supposed to forget about last night?" I get out of bed.

"It was an argument, I thought we would get over it." He says

"Well, I'm not over it. You said a lot of things to me last night but what sticks out the most is the only thing that I have, you said you would take away and that's my job. You like having the power that you have. But I'm going to change that."

"What do you mean it, you're going to change it?"

"I'm moving out." I say

"What the hell do you mean, you're moving out? Where are you going to go? You don't have anything." He says

"I bought my own place. I signed the lease yesterday because I had a feeling this wasn't gonna work out. I wanted my own everything, so if anything like that happened again, I would be good." I say

"So that's something else you went behind my back about. What the hell is your problem? Nobody told you to spend your money and go get your own condo. In my mind, all you're trying to do is distance yourself from me."

"That's exactly what I'm doing. You showed me another whole side of you that I don't want to see again. You put me out and I didn't have anywhere to go. So yeah, I'm setting myself up." I say

"You don't have any right to do that. I'll take care of you. I pay for any and everything, that's the arrangement that we have. I love you so I do that for you, without a problem. You pocket your money and save it, not go spend it on shit that you already have."

"Paul if you didn't do what you did, everything would still be the same but you did it, and this is how it is now. I told you, there needed to be some changes within our relationship and these are the changes that I'm making." I say

"Well, I don't feel comfortable with you staying someplace else." He says

"I don't know what you want from me. You slap me in the face and expect everything to be perfectly fine. It's not, and it hasn't been for a while because you've been displaying violent behavior towards me for a while now and I'm tired of it." I say standing up for myself. "I just need some space."

He shakes his head no, "I'm not giving you that."

"I'm serious Paul, I'm really serious about this. YOU CAN'T KEEP DOING THIS TO ME." I yell, tears beginning to fill my eyes.

I hate this. I'm really trying to make this work but it's just not working out. I feel disrespected and I can't let this continue to happen. I feel like I'm alone in this. This is killing me. I wish he could see how this is effecting me on the inside.

He gets out of bed, walks up to me and hugs me, "I'm sorry, Princess. If it means that much to you, I'll let you move out."

I push him away, "You don't get it. It's not just about me moving out, that is the least of my worries. You have issues—You know what, just forget it." I say over the conversation.

"No help me understand. I want to move forward with you." He says

"You don't see anything wrong with your behavior this last week?" I ask