Scribbles

No.36

There comes a day when everything just clicks. All the pieces you have been juggling just fall into place. Everything makes sense and even then, you are still not entirely sure how you made it. You hear it all the time; it takes a village, and, for the first time in your life, you have a village. You have surrounded yourself with people who care so deeply about you and you have expelled the toxicity that had cocooned you for over a decade and you can finally breathe again. It has never felt so good. You never notice a toxic situation until you kick it in the ass and that is the best feeling on the world. Being able to look back and not be sad that it is over, not regret your decision to walk away, but to be elated that you had the strength to walk away, the will power to say 'That's enough, I'm done'. You look back at it and do not miss it, because you replaced it. You replaced it with a village of friends who would die for you. Who would die in order to save you and you would not even think twice about doing the same. Everything makes sense. Every heartbreak, every loss, every source of pain has led you hear, to this village that you'll be apart of the rest of your life and, for the first time, in an exceptionally long time, you can honestly say, hand on heart, that you are happy. Now, you know that you are not yet whole and it will take time to completely heal, you have your bad days, and unfortunately there are a lot of them, but it is okay, because that process has started, you know what you have to do, you know how to help yourself, you just need to do it. Right now, you are just living in the moment, happy, surrounded by your people, making sense and taking on everything that is being thrown your way. Because everyone says that it takes a village, and you finally have your own.