°cherry tree°- •비민•

五

My heartbeat feels weird.

I mean, the fact I've never paid attention to it makes me think.

Where is it from?

Why is it here?

Why does it help me live?

I touch my left eye and wince in pain. It's completely blue, almost black.

Both of my knees are scraped and the back of them hurts like hell. I can barely walk.

I lay down on my bed, thinking.

No school tomorrow.

Only looking for Jimin.

—

I wake up in the morning.

I only slept for three hours.

It doesn't make me tired, the adrenaline keeps me awake.

I open my closet and ignore my uniform.

It's only 6 AM though.

No time for procrastination.

I put on jeans and a t-shirt. Before leaving, I slap on a bandage on my left eye.

It's pretty warm today, weirdly.

With all of my stuff, I head outside the building, worried.

The sunrise blinds me while I struggle to put on my cap without showing my face.

I'm so paranoiac.

I walk to school and back, again and again, hoping to see Jimin.

I notice a familiar object on the floor.

An asthma pump.

I feel tears come to my eyes. Is it Jimin's pump?

I grab it and read the name.

Jung Hoseok.

No, it's not.

I stare at it for a few seconds and put it in my pocket

Maybe I'll find the owner one day.

I run away when I see people from my school.

I run to the nearest bus stop and sit down.

I notice Jungkook walk in the bus stop with me.

My whole body starts shaking. I hide my face with my cap again, scared of him seeing me. The more he gets closer to me, the more my legs shake. I'm scared. Really scared.

I notice a tear stream down his face.

He's crying

I keep myself from talking.

He keeps worrying me the more he sniffs.

"J-Jungkook? Are you okay?" I put my hand on my mouth. I spoke to him. Oh no. Tears stream down my eyes and I remember what happened yesterday. I stand up and take my bag, about to leave.

I shake, barely able to walk, my knees not helping.

Jungkook grabs my hand.

It's over.

I'm going to get beat up again.

"I-I'm s-so sorry, p-please l-let me go... I-I'll do anything you want-t, I-I p-promise, j-just let me go-o."

He remains silent.

"No, I'm sorry. I destroyed your life. I destroyed your reputation. I probably killed Jimin. I'm a horrible person." I freeze in place.

"W-Wait, what? Why are you-" He pulls me towards him and makes me sit.

"I'm a horrible person. I really am. I apologize for everything I did. It's all my fault."

Everything seems weirdly suspicious.

"B-But... Y-You... You told everyone I-" He cuts me again.

"Please forgive me."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"Many reasons. First of all, Jimin stopped coming to school and I'm thinking of the worst possible. Second of all, look at your eye. They destroyed you. I hope it ends soon though."

I smile.

Silly Jungkook.

"It's not going to end."

"What?"

"I said it's never going to end. My reputation is destroyed. I have no friends anymore. Everyone left me. I accept your apologies, but it's over for me."

He hugs me.

"W-Wait, let me go, Jungkook, everyone is gonna see us-"

He interrupts me again.

"I like guys and I like you especially."

"What?"

"I like guys. And I like you."

My heart stops.

"B-But why- I mean, I'm confused. I-I don't understand- I mean, I really don't- What?"

He smiles.

"I like you."

"Why me?"

"Because."

"Oh."

I remain silent.

But I like Jimin.

I like Jimin.

I can't do anything about it.

I admit it.

I. Like. Jimin.

And only Jimin. He's my sunlight. He lights up my world.

And right now, there's a huge storm in my life.

"I-I'm sorry," I mumble. My heart hurts. So much. It's extremely painful.

"What do you mean, you're sorry?" He says, worried.

I feel tears come to my eyes, but I can't hold them back this time.

Tears stream down my face while I sob, right in front of Jungkook.

I don't hide my face this time.

I cry in front of him.

"I-I'm so sorry, J-Jungkook. S-So sorry-y..."

I grab my bag and leave, running.

"Wait, Taehyung!"

I run as I've never run before. People stare at me but I ignore them.

My legs hurt. A lot. So much.

But my heart hurts more.

I like Jimin.

No.

I love Jimin.

I'm in love with Jimin.

---