°cherry tree°- •비민•

八

I sit down on a bench at the train station, at 4:45 PM. With a group of other people, I wait for the train. There are mostly adults with me instead of students.

Around ten minutes later, I notice a familiar person with a blue hoodie.

My eyes widen as I stand up and walk towards the railing to get a better view of the person across the rails.

I realize it's just a girl with the same hoodie as Jimin.

I notice I'm too close to the rails.

I slip and flail my arms while I trip into the electric rails. I already feel the voltage shooting my body.

Before I fall, someone catches me.

Thank god.

I turn around and notice the familiar tall figure.

"N-Namjoon?"

He stares at me and shakes his head, disappointed. He pulls me towards the bench I was sitting at.

"Stay right here. Ugh, if I knew it was you, I would have let you fall, you idiot. Be careful next time."

He walks away and sits down on a bench a few feet away from mine.

Even though his harsh words hurt me deeply, I still felt his caring personality pop out when he told me to stay on the bench.

But it'll never change.

---inside of the train

A few minutes after the train takes off, a young boy around my age walks towards my seat and stops.

I feel him staring at me for a few seconds, and I try to ignore him by closing my eyes. I notice his blue hoodie and brown hair when I open them again. My mind tells me to turn around, but my body is stuck, staring at the window.

Turn around!

Turn around!

The voices are so loud. So loud. It hurts my head.

Turn around!

I turn around to look at the boy, but he left.

I wonder if that boy was Jimin.

If he was, have I missed my last chance to see him?

---

The train arrives. It is 8 PM right now.

I only brought a bag with a little bit of food and my wallet with money.

I look at the piece of paper with the address written on it. I went crazy and wrote it on around 20 pieces of paper, all shoved in my bag, in fear of losing it.

I also memorized it by heart.

I walk towards the ext of the station. It's raining.

I forgot to bring an umbrella.

The house is not far from here. I make my way towards the bus area and enter one.

I pay for my ticket and wait for my stop. I leave the bus when I see the hotel Hoseok told me about.

My legs hurt and it's getting dark, but I won't give up.

I think about what happened with Hoseok.

--- 1 week earlier

Hoseok showed me the address on the piece of paper after telling me her house is in Busan City and near a small motel.

My surroundings blurred up and I found myself crying in Hoseok's arms.

I'm such a baby.

He tapped my shoulder, calming me down.

"I see you're really sensitive. I used to be like you. I'm 21 now, and I got over it. I used to be bullied because everyone thought I was in a couple with one of my best friends, but we were friends and nothing more than friends."

I nodded in his arms.

"You need a tissue, Taehyung?"

"Y-Yes, please."

He grabbed a box of tissues and gave it to me.

"Thanks, Hoseok. I never met someone and hugged them so quickly."

He laughed.

"You seem to be into Jimin. I think you better go off and find him."

I nodded.

"I'll go now. Thanks so much for everything."

"No problem."

---

I shake my head and come back into reality. While I get down of the bus, I notice the motel in the corner of the street.

I run towards it, soaked by the rain. When I arrive near it, I notice the street Hoseok talked about.

I turn right and count the house numbers, trying to find the correct one. When my eyes land on the number I've been looking for, everything blurs up while I stop walking, staring at the house.

I'm almost here. I'm almost here.

I slowly walk towards the house and walk up the stairs on the entrance.

It is a lovely modern house. It seems small and cozy. When I arrive at the door, I stare at the number. 

I ring the doorbell and wait. My hands are shaking. I'm not sure if it's because of the cold weather or anxiety.

There is no answer.

I look at my clock.

8:58

I take a deep breath and ring again.

And again.

And again.

I notice the mailbox filled to the brim with letters and ads.

My mind crushes and the last bit of hope to find Jimin is destroyed.

I sit down on the floor next to the door, soaked from head to toes, crying and freezing.

It was that night.

March 19th, 20XX. 9:04. 24°F. 

The night I lost all hope.

---