Eden

Chapter 21: Rage

Jonah PoV:
How does she not trust me?
I've told her how much I care for want to keep her safe. Even after how intimate we were last night?
I hold back a growl of frustration and a whimper of sadness.
"Really?" I whisper and she rubs my hand
"S-Sorry I didn't mean to say that." She says and I pull away from her
"No. Clearly that's been in your mind for awhile." I bite my lip and she frowns
"What's wrong?"She asks and I sink my nails into the bed.
"Jonah." She squeaks
She doesn't trust me?!
My wolf is outraged, and at her.
I feel my eyes go black, I'm losing control and she cannot be here when it happens.
"Eden, we can talk in a minute. Just get out." I snarl
"Jonah I'm sorry if I said something-"
"Eden I can't keep you safe right now. Get out." I use my Alpha time which I know may shock her.
She nods and walks away, shaking slightly
And then of course I lose control.

I finally get control again and Eden walks in nervously
I groan, I haven't lost control in a long time.
Sitting pressed against the end of the bed on the floor, my arms resting on my propped up knees.
Never has it ever happened while Eden was in my life.
She walks over and cups my cheek.
"Jonah? Are you okay?"
"Y-Yeah." I say, shakily
"I'm sorry for what I said." She whimpers
"D-don't-" I cough out and she frowns
"Jonah, what specifically...made you mad?" She sniffles and I shake my head
"Nothing, it's all in my head."
"No! Please tell me."  She whispers
"Y-you don't trust me? After everything?" I breathe, heart broken.
"Of course I trust you." She finally breathes back
She rubs her thumb along my face and I bite my lip
"I love you Eden." I whimper, too weak to try and hide my emotions as usual.
"I love you too Jonah."
"But?" I breathe, she sighs and pulls her hand away
I refuse to let go of the sparks I take her hands in mine.
"But I don't know who I can trust anymore, you and Sandy, that's it. I don't know about Frasier or anyone in this pack." She frowns
"I'm not surprised you have trust issues. You trust naturally. B-but it's okay to trust people." I say, still shaky
"Jonah I've never seen you lose control, are you sure you're okay?" She asks
I don't reply.
I just close my eyes and tip my head back, letting out a groan.
I whimper and shake my head
"N-no." I whisper out
Eden whimpers too and makes me get up
She forces me into bed and sniffles
"Rest. Please Jonah I don't like feeling like this."
She told about that little ache in her heart whenever I'm not happy.
"Just keep talking." I mumble and she nods
She talks about birds, funny I never knew how fondly she could talk about her favourite animal. She then moves on to talking about how she fell ill once as a little girl. She had a horrendous fever, and couldn't get out of bed for weeks. Next up she talks about a girl she saw, the girl didn't look like a wolf. She had horns and red skin. I know that to be a demon, I won't bother her with that. I feel myself slipping away but tell her not to stop.
Eden PoV:
Jonah...
His wolf had never been that angry.
I had made him that angry.
I begin to cry.
I've failed him as a mate, I'm not supposed to make him feel that way.
This man has fucked up my whole coping mechanism, so I'm a crier now.
I sob and sob until he finally mumbles
"Please don't cry baby."
I wipe my eyes and pout
"W-why not."
"Because." He whispers, still to weak to talk.
I just nod and decide to sleep on the couch, giving him space form the woman he hates.
I bite my lip and let out a sob.
I close my eyes. Don't cry it'll keep him up.
I hug myself and try to fall asleep.

I wake up to a groan from Jonah
I jump up and hurry to my mate.
"Everything okay?"
"Why don't you trust me? I love you so much and I've tried so hard to keep you safe, You mated me." He says, his face buried in his hands.
"Jonah." I whisper.
With one question I managed to undermine every drop of love.
"Of course I trust you. I just...ever since my mother died, when things get tough I go to this dark place inside myself. Where I try to sabotage everything. I love you and us and how you make me feel, like a carnival of steroids!" He chuckles at that
"So just don't let me ruin this."
"Do you do trust me?"
"Yes Jonah. You are basically all I trust." I say and he pulls me close
"I never want to come that close to hurting you again." He snaps and I nod
"Tell me more about this dark place." He says and I hum.
"Well, I tend to stop talking as much. I stop eating and lash out at everyone. I try to push everything away and shut down." I mumble and he nods.
"Well, let's not let that happen." He says and I kiss him
"I'm so sorry Jonah, I didn't mean to make you feel like that." I say and he kisses me gently
"Mmm. My wolf just...I don't like it when he's mad at you." He shudders and I nod
"I hope you know I love you so much, and I can't thank you enough for rescuing me. I have to say this too, mating you is the best thing I've ever done." I moan the last part and he chuckles
He pulls me close and I close my eyes.
I feel his ragged breathing begin to calm.
His wolf is terrifying, if he can take this much out of Jonah...imagine what he could to Someone he hates...
I shudder and he looks at me
"Eden, I scared you didn't I?"
"Y-Yeah." I breathe
"I promise I will never let my wolf hurt you. That's why I told you to get out." He says and I nod
Our foreheads press together and I hum.
"You need me to prove it?" He sighs and I shake my head
"No. I just hope you're okay." I breathe and he smiles
"I'll be fine when you wake up." He says and I nod
Knowing that I undermined everything we'd been through must've made his blood boil.
"And I'm not like those men because I never would've killed an innocent man by choice."