Against the Heart (Azucarera Series #1)

Kabanata 32

Kabanata 32

Torn

He's in love with me for years? He wants to be my boyfriend?

It was an awkward but peaceful moment. Tahimik ang gabi sa Altagracia at tanging ihip lang ng malamig na hangin ang naririnig, bukod sa malayong videoke at tahol ng aso. My heart probably stopped beating during those glorious moments of watching him, almost near my reach, if only I would extend and arm and touch him.

I am torn. Hindi ko alam kung maniniwala ba ako o sasabihing nagsisinungaling siya. But I know Leandro, and one of the reasons why I fell for him was that he has such high regard for honor and truth. At hindi sila magiging magkaibigan ni Kuya kung hindi siya ganoon.

This all boils down to this... if he says he wants to be my boyfriend... then he... really wants to be my boyfriend.

I can sense the growing impatience in his eyes. Like it was such a pain in the ass to give me time to think about what he just said in the middle of this cold night.

"Your... girlfriend?" I echoed his last words softly, still can't process it.

A ghost of a smile played on his lips. "Yes."

Madaling akusahan siya na nanloloko sa akin pero alam kong hindi siya ganoon. Or maybe, I wanted to hear more about this thing.

"You're in love with me... for years?" I echoed his words again.

Bahagya siyang yumuko. Tumango rin bago sumagot.

"Yes."

Kailan? Nasa barko siya at iniisip niya ako? The thought of that sent shivers down my spine. Paano si Keira? Her image flashed my mind and before my mood turn sour, I cut her off. Sa ilang taon kong palihim na pangangarap kay Leandro, gusto kong pagbigyan ang sarili ko sa sandaling ito. To talk only about his feelings... if somehow it reflected with mine... or even come close to mine.

"In love?" I said softly.

Nag-angat siya ng tingin sa akin.

"In love."

Nag-iwas ako ng tingin, para bang nasa paligid ang sagot sa mga tanong sa aking utak. I have been in love with him for years, too. But I wonder if it's the same kind. I mean... he probably got it wrong.

"You know there are different kinds of love, right?" sabi ko.

Nagtaas siya ng kilay at tumango.

"Is this the kind of love you have for friends... like platonic or with no malice or..." hindi ko naman masabi ang susunod.

"Or?" ngumuso siya, tinatago na ang halatang ngiti.

Iritado na tingin ko natutuwa siya sa tanong ko, I narrowed my eyes. "What?"

He tilted his head. "I'm waiting for the next option. Hindi mo tinapos."

Humalukipkip ako. "Why don't you describe it instead?" Iritado kong hamon.

Hindi niya na itinago ang ngisi ngayon. Naghintay ako sa sasabihin niya. Tumikhim siya at pilit na winawala ang ngisi bago nagpatuloy.

"Alright, then," he said and composed himself more.

Unti-unting nagpaparinig ang malalakas na pintig ng puso ko, para bang alam nito ang nagbabadyang sasabihin.

"The kind of love I have for friends..."

My heart hurt as it pounded on my ribcage. Hindi ako agad nagpakawala ng hininga. Akala ko nga lang tapos na.

"And then the kind that's... sexual and passionate. The one with malice and certainly not platonic. I feel all of it only for you."