It's currently 8pm and were getting everything together to hit my house then get the hell out of here.
I'm laying in bed just thinking shit over. Angle, Melissa, Daniel, and Gustavo are going over the map that will lead them, unharmed, to the location of the private jet. They will wait there until Daniel and I return from my house.
By the way, we made up our mind to stay in Spain.
I still don't know how to feel about moving so far. Actually, I do. I fucking hate it. I hate having to stay so far away. I hate to leave my family. I hate to leave Diablo.
I look over at Diablo. He's quietly sitting down at the far corner with the boys loading up guns, again.
We haven't talked much today. The only thing he's said to me is what I wanted to eat for breakfast and if I trusted Daniel, nothing else. My thoughts are that he's nervous about the plan, and also hurt for sending me away. He's said so himself. It's hard for both of us, but I'm starting to think separating might help us in a way.
We aren't together right now, but it's been pretty clear that we still have feelings for each other. We've been through so much shit together, which is what has kept us separated. Maybe what we need is some time apart. It will help determine if our feelings are truly loved for a relationship or maybe we've been together for so long that it might all be friendship-type-love. We won't know until I come back.
Hopefully, when I return he feels the same as I do. Whatever those feelings might be so we don't get our feelings hurt.
Before we take off, I do want to have a talk with him to properly say goodbye. I should talk to him now because when shit goes down we won't have time to talk at all.
So I walk over.
"Hey," I say to him in particular.
He looks up at me for a split second then back down to his ak47, "what's up? You okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, I'm okay. Just wanted to see how you are holding up. You haven't talked much today. Are you okay?" I ask.
The boys must have taken the hint that this was going to be a deep conversation because they put the guns down, and joined the others.
Once they were a little further Diablo answered.
"Yeah, I'm fine," he pauses to put the weapon down then looks up at me. "There's so much weight on my shoulders right now, and it's killing me."
I sigh in stress. Another reason why I should stay, to just be there for him. I know he won't admit his vulnerabilities to anyone else, but me. He will need someone to rant too.
"It'll work, Lorenzo. I know it will," I encourage as I give his shoulder a gentle squeeze.
He nods touching my hand, "I hope so."
"It will so, remember?"
He grins, "Well I hope it will so."
I giggle then bite my lip. "Can we talk? Outside. Privately."
"Yeah just give me a minute."
I tell the others that were going to be outside, and they just nod. Diablo had to use the bathroom so I went ahead, and waited for him on the stairs we sat last night.
After a couple minutes go by, he comes out then sits right next to me.
Without saying anything, I grab his hand, interlocking our hands together, then lean on his shoulder.
Emotion fills me up and I begin to cry.
I've been holding it for a while.
He kisses the top of my head and holds me even tighter.
