SEVEN MINUTES || L. NORRIS

THREE

It's in all the little things, when you smile, now it stings

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LANDO

I threw my car keys onto the kitchen bench, reaching for a glass as I ran the tap. I tugged on my hair, glancing out of the window into the night sky, and waited to feel Issy's arms wrap around my waist. But of course, I felt nothing. I filled the glass with cold water and headed towards my bedroom, where I removed my clothes and left them in a messy pile on the floor. Harshly, I placed the glass of water on my bedside cabinet, flicking on the lamp and climbing between the cold sheets. Her side of the bed was so empty and so cold; I could only wish to have her beside me. The tears resurfaced in my eyes again, whilst I stared up at the ceiling, an uncomfortable feeling growing in my lower abdomen. The thought of Isabelle being so upset and alone at this hour completely destroyed me, because I knew it was all my fault. It took me so much strength to restrain myself from calling her, asking her if she wanted me to come back. I knew she wasn't going to answer.

As I looked up at the crisp white paint covering the ceiling of my bedroom, I wiped beneath my nose. My skin was soaking, the salty tears were swarming my cheeks, as everything came crashing down. I took a shaky breath, my insides tingling with fear as I realised what I had done. I forced her away, I pushed her away because I was so caught up in the life I was living to realise how much she truly needed me. Every time she called to say she was fine, she was lying. I should have never been so naive and I should have thought a little harder about her situation, even if it did mean I showed up to the McLaren garage a few minutes too late. I created a fist with my right hand and I slammed it against the mattress, letting out a distressed cry as I felt my heart breaking, with nothing I could do about it. The pain I felt was so immense, it was like a constant stabbing feeling, with someone jabbing a knife straight through my heart over and over again.

I couldn't help myself; I picked up my phone with my shaking fingers and unlocked it, rushing to find Isabelle's contact details. Even if she was asleep, I needed to wake her. I needed to know she was alright and I needed to hear her voice ringing through my ears.

"Issy," I whispered, when the phone stopped ringing and she answered. "Issy please, please don't do this. I'll come pick you up, we can talk about it..."

"What did I tell you, Lando?" It was obvious that she'd been crying. Her voice was hoarse and shaky, as she spoke breathlessly down the phone. "I have nothing else to say to you."

She cut me off. I screamed, throwing my phone off of the bed, so it hit the floor with a bang. I regretted absolutely every little thing I did to Isabelle. She didn't want anything to do with me. It hurt me because I did everything I could if it meant I could provide her with a good life. I knew I was away all the time, but travelling to race was my job, which I knew she understood. But her anxiety was out of her control and the amount of times I had to leave her week in and week out, was something neither of us could do anything about. The pain was excruciating.

As the clock struck two in the morning, I began to feel a little tired, my eyes falling shut whilst I struggled to keep them open. All I could do was think about Isabelle. Her face was plastered into each corner of my mind; she was so innocent, so exquisite and it made me wonder why I needed such a career, when I already had something that made me happy. Isabelle was amazing, she was far too good for me. I always knew that I was punching above my weight, but we were made for one another, so that didn't matter. We had each other and that was everything we could have asked for. Everything about her was so perfect and there was absolutely nothing that I didn't love about her.