Person Of Interest. [GoodGuyFitz]

Annabelle. (12)

"Then what is living?"

I hesitated for a few seconds, then slowly leaned in and kissed him.

"That's living."

~

I pulled away from Cam, unsure if I should say anything or not. He stayed silent while I played with my fingers. The feeling of embarrassment plagued my mind and I felt the need to just get out of his car. He literally just told me he couldn't get attached to me and I just turned around and kissed him- Who am I? Not Rory, that's for sure.

I started to feel like I was living two different lives. Rory, the sweet, innocent and broken girl who dealt with flashbacks and PTSD on the daily. Rory wouldn't have smuggled illegal drugs across a city. Rory wouldn't have kissed a guy who didn't kiss her first. And Rory definitely wouldn't have done fucking cocaine.

After another thirty seconds passed by I couldn't deal with my mind racing much longer. "Cam, I'm sorry," I said softly, then unbuckled my seat belt, "I-I don't know what came over me, I'm still high and-"

"Rory, stop," Cam finally spoke up as I opened up the car door. He reached over me and shut my door, the feeling of his hand and arm against my stomach gave me insane butterflies. "That was um. It's not that I didn't enjoy it, but if we do get involved, you do understand that we can't let the other guys know? At least not for a while."

I exhaled and dropped my head into my hands, dragging them over my face, "Yeah. I get it."

"Can we talk about this later? Preferably when you're not coming down from coke and when I'm not sleep deprived?" Cam chuckled.

"Right, yes. That's probably a good idea," I admitted then opened the door again, "I'll see you around?"

"Of course. Goodnight Rory," Cam grabbed my hand and gave it a light squeeze.

"Goodnight Cam."

As I walked back into my house I wasn't sure if I had made things worse or if I made things a lot better. What I didn't understand was why the other lads couldn't know we had something going on with each other. Regardless of that, I'm not going to test their patience or ask questions. After tonight I had finally earned some brownie points and I'm not about to ruin all of that.

I know I said I wouldn't and shouldn't get involved with Cam, but the chemistry we have is too good to pass up. This is a situation where Katy would definitely come in handy, but I can't tell her about what I'm involved in. Even though she knows so little, that little is already too much and I could easily put her life in jeopardy. The only reason why I'm alive is because Cam put in a good word for me, which I'm beyond grateful for.

My finger circled a glass of water as I thought about everything. The driving, my argument with Jay, the coke, Blake, and kissing Cam. It was just too much. My mind was on overdrive at this point and too many things had happened today for me to stay awake any longer. Turing my brain off seemed like the only logical thing to do at this point, so that's what I did.

"Fuckin hell," I mumbled, toying with the new bruise Harry had just given me on my shoulder. His punch was meant for my face but I turned at the last second and let my shoulder take the blow. It probably would have been less painful in the face.

"Do you think it's out of place?" Annabelle sat down next to me and felt around. As she ran her fingers over the spot where he had hit me, I winced. She cringed, "Sorry bout that."

"I don't think it's out of place. Just bruised badly. If it's possible to bruise bones, then the bone is definitely bruised," I pouted my lip and rubbed my shoulder again. I know it doesn't do anything to help, but it did make me feel a bit better. It had been almost two weeks since Harry had locked me down here, and even more for the rest.