Because I had you

Chapter Nineteen

Lana's P.O.V

"I'm so proud of you, you really made it."He said with a smile on his face. "And it's so great to see you so happy about everything."

"Thanks Bern, same with you. You are really showing off your talent."I replied with a smile on my face. "You showed the world what you really are."

He let out a chuckle and shook his head to the side, he was just going to say something but Laporte appeared next to him.

"Lana?"He asked as he looked at me. "Oh my gosh, you are actually here."

"Yeah."I replied with a chuckle. "Is a hug going to help you realise it?"

He began to stammer his words, I took a step closer to him and hugged him tightly as he did the same.

He pulled away from the hug, his eyes brimmed with tears. "I'll see you in a bit, I've gotta do something."

Then he left.

I looked at Beranado."Is he okay?"

Beranado shrugged his shoulders. "He doesn't talk much anymore, that's the most anyone of us can get out of him from the past few months."

"No one knows the reason why?"

"Oh my gosh, is that Beranado silva?!"Richard screamed as he stood next to me. he began to fangirl. "Oh fuck, I love him!"

Really Richard? Now?

Beranado let out a laugh. "Hi, you are?"

Richard looked at him in awe, not being able to talk to him. I let out a sigh and shook my head, I looked at Beranado. "This is my friend, Richard and he loves you. And I'm going to leave you to talk to each other."

Richard nodded eagerly, I let out a chuckle and walked away from them, on a mission to find Laporte.

Aguero and Erick were with Jesus, clowning on him. Halayna and Zabdiel were talking with Zinchenko and his wife along with Hannah with them and nodding to everything that was said.

I walked further more to see Kevin and Chris sat down at a table and having a full heart to heart conversation, I quickly turned the other way to see him in front of me.

"Lana?"

I took a step back, I looked at him with a worried expression on my face. "No, No, not here."

I quickly turned back around and looked for the nearest exit, I found it and I quickly speed walked out of the building.

He was behind me.

I quickly picked up on my speed and began to run.

"Lana?"He yelled my name as he ran behind me. "Lana?"

I didn't listen.

"Lana? Come on, stop running!"He yelled as he began to lose his breath.

He's a footballer, he runs on a pitch for 90 minutes but yet he can't run much?

Shows much doesn't it?

"Lana Banana, wait hold up."He said as he ran behind me. "Please don't go."

I stopped in my tracks and turned around to him, my eyes brimmed with tears. "D-Dont't you dare."

"Lana."

"W-What? W-What do you want?"

"Look, I'm honestly really sorry how everything happened. I want a fresh start with you."

"N-No."

"Lana, please!"

"I hate you! Just get away from me!"

"You don't mean that... Please Lana, you don't hate me."

Tears began to stream down my face as I looked at him, my tears slowly blurred out my vision.

"N-No, you are right. Mostly I h-hate the way I don't hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all."I said as I looked at him, my eyes focused onto him. Him in that white shirt with his black tie on and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows along with his black trousers on and his Oxford not bourges shoes."That kills me the most, it's like I held the gun and pointed it at my chest and as if I pulled the trigger. I gave you everything but you walked away with it. When I told you that I loved you, it gave you power and everything. You didn't think of me once, you just triggered every bullet that ripped me apart."

Tears brimmed in his eyes."Lana, come on, that isn't really fair."

"Leroy Aziz Sane, life isn't fair. Life isn't what we want it to be but yet here we are now."

"Lana, I can't l-lose you again."

"You should of thought about that when you decided to put a ring on her."

"L-Lana..."

"I broke De bruyune's heart, I left Aguero in the lurch. For what though? Because of you."

I turned around, I brought my hand to wipe the tears away and wiped the tears away.

He pulled my other hand and turned me around to him. "I never meant to cause you pain, I never meant to do anything to you but shower you with love and honour your worth. I was such a dog to you. I'll never forgive myself for it because I never wanted you to be my weekend love, I wanted more but I couldnt steal you from another. I'm so sorry it ended real bad and I'm so sorry for treating you like this. You didn't derseve it, I know times have changed and times does heal wounds. Because it's time we reach out to each other and allow us to bring out the best in each other like we used to when we were best friends."

"Y-You want us to be b-best friends again?"I said as I took a step back and yanked my hand out of his hold.

"Is there something really wrong with you?"I asked as I touched the side of my head to indicate. "It's true, people who are friends that were in relationships either still love each other or never did. But I know what it was, you never did and I was only the weekend lover."

"I'm really honest right now, I shouldn't of let you go. Thought I knew what I wanted, but I didn't know myself. I can tell you are with someone that makes you happy."He said as he let out a sigh. "You are with someone i can't be and you are happy, it was time I met someone new and she may of helped me forgot but she's something but not you, there's nothing left to lose because I had you. There's nothing I can do and I wish I had you. I told myself she was the one to get me through, but love her and love you is different but I had you and that was my fault."

"Is that all?"I asked as I looked at him.

"Do you really hate me?"He replied with a question, his face full of hurt. His eyes brimmed with tears. "Lana, do you?"

"I hate you because I fell in love with you."I replied then I turned around and walked off.